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‘There is no growth without struggle, painful experiences are why we change and difficulty is how we grow’. Dr. Aria is a clinical psychologist and one of the UK’s leading performance coaches who specialises in psychological resilience. He’s worked with Academy Award winners, high profile creative artists, global entrepreneurs and some of the world’s most successful CEOs coaching them on mindset, resilience, and mindfulness. Dr. Aria is also co-author of the best-selling book A Mindful Year, contributing author to the academic textbook A Prescription for Healthy Living, and is regularly featured in mainstream lifestyle and news publications such as The Times, The Telegraph and Men’s Health. This conversation is really quite something. Dr Aria has been on an incredibly life changing journey and in this episode he’s here to talk about that journey and share what he’s learned about our life quest and finding our truth, the importance of struggle in growth, the power of vulnerability and how to build greater resilience. A lot of this conversation gave me goosebumps, and I can guarantee it’ll make you reconsider your approach to finding happiness and fulfilment. I hope you enjoy the episode as much as I did 🙂
00:00 Intro
02:00 Your background
08:38 Life as a quest to return to your truth
11:32 Science and spirituality
16:04 High performance and understanding the mind
20:19 Your ex-wife’s affair and pregnancy
29:38 ARIA framework
35:50 Figuring out your values and mission
49:51 Fears and the strength of vulnerability
01:00:32 How to understand your feelings
01:06:46 Negative emotions in relationships
01:11:00 Expressing your inner truth
01:26:17 Dealing with doubt and overthinking
01:31:33 The importance of losing yourself
01:36:30 Identifying and releasing emotions
01:50:47 The conditioned self vs the true self
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📄SHOW NOTES & TRANSCRIPT
Visit the website for the transcript and highlights from the conversation –
🎙 ABOUT THE PODCAST
Deep Dive is the podcast that delves into the minds of entrepreneurs, creators and other inspiring people to uncover the philosophies, strategies and tools that help us live happier, healthier and more productive lives.
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Hey friends and welcome back to Deep Dive the weekly podcast where every week It's my immense privilege to sit down With academics and authors and creators And entrepreneurs and other inspiring People and we find out how they got to Where they are and the strategies and Tools we can learn from them to help us Build a life that we love what you're About to hear is an interview between me And Dr Arya now Dr Arya is a clinical Psychologist who specializes in Psychological resilience resilience is The ability to accept understand process And grow through emotional pain first of All we have to accept and acknowledge it Next we have to release some process it Then we have to understand it and then We can grow through it and the final is To act in line with our values and our Vision he's worked with Academy Awards Winners high profile creative artists Global entrepreneurs and some of the World's most successful CEOs and I've Worked with individuals who've created Multi-billion pound companies and Products who are deeply dissatisfied and Discontent with where they are it may be Bringing in a huge amount of income but They don't feel fully fulfilled because They've lost something along the way He's also the co-author of the Best-selling book a mindful year and he Regularly features in Publications like
The times and the Telegraph and Men's Health and in the conversation we talk About firstly our life Quest and how we Can find Our Truth power of Vulnerability and how to build greater Resilience we talk about the importance Of struggle when it comes to growth and There were so many parts of the Conversation where I literally got Goosebumps from the way that he was Describing the stuff I was like oh my God this is like he's literally speaking Truth so so that hits my soul so much That I'm getting Goosebumps there's a Storm coming and it's going to hit the Question is will we be able to find the Cam amidst the storm At the moment according to the YouTube Analytics 81 of you who are watching This on YouTube have not yet hit the Subscribe button and so if you're for Example in the now 81 of people who are Watching this on YouTube but who are not Subscribed to the channel I would love It if you could do so and would be Awesome to get that number down to 50 And it would be cool to get like 50 50 Sub non-sub ratio just just for fun so Dr Arya thank you so much for joining us On the podcast oh it's a pleasure I'm Delighted to be here so much to talk About um around mindfulness around high Performance around Behavior change Around the things that we struggle with
When it comes to behavior and things but Before we go there I wonder if Um for people in in our audience who Might not be familiar with your work or Who you are I wonder if you can just Kind of Blitz through your backstory in In a few minutes like what's how did it How do we get here what's the backstory I was born and bred in Glasgow so my Father is Persian he's from Iran and his Family were from uh diplomatics close to The Chevron and he studied Manson and When he was 19 he moved to London and be Began to train in the UK and my mum grew Up in a very tough upbringing in Glasgow And her family said you know if you Wanted to go into the helping profession You should be a nurse but my mom always Said no I want to be a doctor and she Was the first person in her family to go To university and she met my dad at Medical school so fast forward a number Of years I was born my older brother Uh and there was two of us for about 11 Years and then we had a younger brother Join of he was the joke of he was a Surprise to my mum but or a surprise to My dad but not to my mum and we had a Very A very close family huge amount of love Uh my father put a huge amount of Focus and Credence on Academia and Developing yourself my mum I would say is almost like an angel
She's got a Heart full of love and Really taught me the values of Compassion and understanding and in Terms of my career scope initially School and then I went to Edinburgh to Study medicine And That was really following the footsteps Of my parents and was my first lesson in The difference between doing what Society deems to be What you should do versus following your Intuitive wisdom and your heart so to Speak My dad was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma type of cancer and was great For it very progressed and he was given A propagnosis of about 15 survival And again that was my first introduction To mortality or life not going the way That you'd expect it to And really dealing with a reality that You don't want to accept and my Girlfriend went through a traumatic Incident and that's the first time I Think I really felt out of control where Something's happening you have no Ability to change the outcome And I spiraled into depression uh I Didn't know how to handle my emotions From a kid growing up was very quiet And if I felt anything I'd push it down I would just go into my head create an Internal world
And And I really struggled it just began to Spiral down and I was at the point of You know considering suicide I was on Medication And I had this moment where my brother Out of love felt like let's get away I'll take you to a beautiful place we'll Just have time together and I remember Her standing on a beach in Mauritius With him and the Sun was shining and the The waves were rolling up to my feet And I looked around and the scenery was Beautiful and I was miserable And I didn't want to be here and in that Moment I had this instant that No matter what is happening around you There's two Paths of external journey And there was an internal one there's Inner peace and joy and meaning and Fulfillment and these two are not Necessarily connected and so I really Made a spiritual intention to go on a Journey to find what at that time I Could only describe the inner peace how Can I find that sense of Serenity and Calmness so that no matter what is Happening to me I can still Remain standing And so To try and yeah Fast Track that I left Uh University dropped out probably more Act began doing the only thing which I
Knew that I loved which was working for Charities Began fundraising trained to be an actor Because I struggled to find my own voice And I I learned a lot through that Process and then one day I was actually On a pilgrimage with my father Who couldn't continue their couldn't Really carry out the uh the pilgrimage On its own so I was pushing him in a Wheelchair and I just had this Whisper that came from my heart which is Go back and study psychology so I Literally changed tact went back I had Six days before ucas closed sent off the Application did a doctorate in UCL in Clinical Psychology specialized and Overlap between physical health and Mental health Particularly looking at If you were Delta hand at its very worst For individuals who were told they had a Life limiting disease or they had X Number of months to live how would you Live out the rest of that time with as Much joy as possible And then I worked at Great Ormond Street Hospital with individuals who Whose children were given a prognosis of A terminal illness And as a parent whenever you're Suffering this Immense emotional pain how do you still Turn up to your child how do you still
Be there for them and and squeeze any Joy that is still left in that time that You have which is so precious And then I did my clinic my uh Clinical Research in sustainable weight loss and Then from then it was another uh scenic Route to high performance work but I Think that's probably taken about 14 Minutes already wow That's that's a It's quite a circuitous kind of path I Think often finds a lot with people on This on this podcast where kind of Someone gets interviewed because they've Kind of made it in a particular field And you would think that the path was Like oh I knew what I wanted and I kind Of went for it because like why not Um but actually there's a lot of windy Twists and turns along along the way to To get somewhere I see Life of a it's a Quest If the quest to Return to your truth and along the way As you grow up you pick up certain Beliefs or ideas your mind is Conditioned in a certain way because of The accidents of birth Because of your personal experiences and We build up all these layers and coping Mechanisms and this Armory that we put On to protect ourselves and this Quest Is an unraveling uh a shedding to return To who you truly are and that's the path
That we're all on And there's a there's a quote By A.H Almas which always stands by me Which is All these conflicts the Difficult situations the Problematic situations are not chance or Haphazard they're actually Europe They're specifically yours designed Specifically for you by a part of you That loves you more than anything else And that part of you loves you More than anything else have created Roadblocks to lead you back to yourself And you're not going in the right Direction unless you're feeling prickier In the fade telling you Look here And that part of you loves you so much That it doesn't want you to lose the Chance It will go to Extreme Measures and it Will make you suffer greatly if you Don't listen what else can it do that is Its purpose So it's like The obstacles that you encounter are not A sign necessarily a sign that you're Going in the wrong direction but that You're going in the right direction The obstacles are are fire and in order To be refined We need to apply heat There is no growth without struggle
Painful experiences are why we change And the difficulty of how we grow Without it we'll be staying in the same Place and the one principle of the Universe of evolution We evolve The world evolves and it will continue To evolve and it's evolved for 13.8 Billion years and it will continue to Evolve the estimates are for hundreds of Trillions of years so This Process will continue and we've been Given this gift of a snapshot literally Just a a micro Blink in the history of this universe And we are part of that Evolution and That's what I see our our purpose here Is to evolve One of the things I love about your your Story and and the kind of when you've Been another podcast and things is that You I think do a really good job of Combining the The woo side of life with like the Sciency side of life and I think a few Years ago I would have been very Skeptical of all of the spiritual stuff Yeah um but recently I've started Reading you know a bunch of Alan Watts Like trying to understand the whole Zen Thing like coming across um you know the Power of now and that kind of stuff and Then speaking to a bunch of guests on
The podcast sometimes during the Conversation sometimes outside of the Conversation a lot of people discover Their route through Spirit to Spirituality through psychedelics or Something like that to make them realize Oh hang on there's something like bigger Out there Um but then you kind of take that side Of things and combine it with the Clinical psychologist approach I'm very similar to you I I grew up with Academia and I grew up with science and I trained as a scientist practitioner And I value the mind so much And my expertise is in Psychology is an Understanding how does the Mind work why Do we do what we do and how can we Develop greater self-awareness to be Able to see that the mind is a tool it's Not who we are it is a an instrument and We can use that instrument for immense Good or we can use it for atrocities we Can use it to Become closer and bring the best out of A partner and we can use it in a way That will end up devastating a Relationship and hurting the partner We've created The atomic bomb and we've created Treatments for cancer if it's a tool and How we use it is integral to the welfare Of ourselves and others And I would always place so much
Importance on on the mind and on science And I'll be 40 this year in the last Couple of years what I've realized is That There is more to what we can see and There's more to what we can test in our Laboratory And and I'm putting more value on what I Feel and the experiences which I'm Having which I cannot explain Because The truth is we can only see a fragment Of The light spectrum anyway And we don't see mobile waves or Infrared waves we don't hear every sound There is we're actually just having this Limited Splice of reality And you can even bring in quantum Physics I used to you know I used to Hear World connected The Buddhists or the Hindus or the Mystics would talk about Oneness and Experiencing Oneness with all and when You look at quantum physics On a subatomic level 99.99 Is space There is actually no Quantum physical Difference between myself and this table Whenever I'm tapping the table it's the Electrons and the electromagnetic field Hitting off the electrons and
Electromagnetic field of the table but I Sense of being solid So the spiritual I think in the Scientific are often intimately Intertwined and there's a way of holding Both And when we look at even Clinical Psychology and we look at cognitive Behavioral Theory or we look at third Wave approaches to Mental Health Where do these come from they actually Grew out of ancient contemplative Traditions from from cognitive theory Grew out of stoic philosophy Mindfulness-based approaches grew out of Buddhist and Hindu and yogic and Medicines of practices so if we're going To ask Ancient question such as What is the purpose of my life where do I find meaning in my life how can I live A good life that is is Rich and full of meaning and joy and And peace then really a lot of the Ancient thinkers and ancient traditions Hold Vehicles which we we can begin to use to Get closer to our own truth I love it Okay so many so many kind of Um paths to go down here I wonder if we Can kind of frame this in the Almost with the with the lens of high Performance so so you work with Um kind of executive CEOs Founders like
People running you know multi-million to Multi-billion Dollar companies And So what are the problems that people Like that or actually and and I guess Kind of more normal people what are the Problems that people face in their Day-to-day life in the day-to-day work Where you find that your experience kind Of combining spiritual with the Scientific can help So individuals that I work with are Highly brilliant they have creative Minds they're very powerful minds they Are self-motivated they're interested in Self-growth they often come from a place Of care and compassion And something will have happened where They feel stuck in their life right now And it's not something they're used to They're struggling with an aspect of Their life And it could be That they wake up one day and everything From an external perspective Loose Impressive But then they have this question which Is nagging which is is this it is this What my life is all about Or they focus so much on career and on Supporting people around them that They've lost that sense of balance And they've lost that sense of who they
Are The relationships are suffering again They've put so much Focus that suddenly They've lost Intimacy in the Relationship but they've lost connection And again they wake up one day and they They look at the person next to them and They know that they love them and they Know that they make a great team and That They're amazing parents together but It's almost like two individuals just Living in the same house they don't have They don't have that connection which They could see they had 10 years ago And that is so tough because it's so Tough whenever you know how you like Life to be but you don't know where to Start And what they've recognized is It's their own psychology which is often The biggest barrier Your own mind can either Propel you with Such force or it can hold you back and Keep you paralyzed and keep you stuck And where I come in is I happen to have Dedicated 10 15 20 years understanding The mind because the mind follows Certain principles and certain rules And the more that you can intimately get To know your mind the more you can Actually begin to Take action or have clarity From your mind
So it's not about having peace of mind It's about having peace from mind and in Those moments of Stillness Life becomes so clear you have Clarity You see What has gone wrong and where you should Go next So when when someone comes to you as a New client or patient or whatever you Call it like a client Do they know what's up with them and Like what their problem is or like what Sort of questions do you ask them to get Yeah to kind of unravel what's what's Going on and what's what's keeping them Stuck They often have an a very good idea of The pain that they're in and what They're suffering and it could be that Life has dealt them hard hand at this Point in The Game of Life And even bringing in Buddhist philosophy One of the first Noble Truth is that Life involves suffering And From my perspective the three aspects of Reality we cannot avoid Life involves pain it involves Uncertainty and it involves change And we all face unexpected And unwanted event in life I went through three years ago where the The woman that I loved to rebuilt a life Up together over 10 years one day told
Me that she's been having an affair with A man from work and is pregnant with his Child That was for me at the time one of the Worst things I could have Imagined just one of them because it Felt like I had lost this world that I'd Built up I lost my wife and our dog Alfie and the homie created and her Family who Became like family to me and this and This imagined life of growing all Together for an old man and woman on the Street and I'd imagine that would be of Together and it just came crashing down Now that just happened to be my story Everyone has gone through deep heartache And pain So we lose someone we love or we're a Single women love to be in a Relationship or we struggle to conceive Or we become pregnant when we didn't Expect you or we become unwell or a Loved one does or we just face these Curveballs and challenges that work in Our personal life that we have no Control over and we didn't see coming And so often people know what the Problem is But what they can tell is they feel Overwhelmed or they feel isolated or There is A lack of security in terms of what is Happening
And They want to find a way from the Darkness into the light And that is the path that we go on There's a storm coming and it's going to Hit the question is will we be able to Find the cam amidst the storm The path has involved cultivating that Inner Strength and knowing and resilience and Compassion in order to deal with Whatever life throws at us Because success doesn't depend on what Happens to you it's determined by what We do next And if we can cultivate that place of Cam so that no matter what is happening Even if there is a storm raging but Still is part of a hurricane is its Center and from and that place of Stillness and calmness and serenity Exists within all of us Deep Stone it's a field of Consciousness Which we can access and from that place Of cameras and serenity It doesn't mean that life isn't Difficult but with a sense of ease and We begin to flow with life and then life Begins to change the only constant life Will change the question is are we Fighting against it or are we going to Flow with it All right we're just going to take a Quick break from the podcast to
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Whenever it hit all the principles which I've worked from Just naturally came into playing it it Worked through me I don't think it's Something which I consciously began to Think okay oh I should bring this in or I should bring that in it's something Which had already begun to practice as Part of my life just the individual I am I can only talk about something or teach Or train something that I have lived by And that I do on a daily basis Everything that I speak to you about With my clients I do every day for hours every day I'm Continually wanting to focus on becoming Present this present is the only moment That exists And in this this moment right now Everything is actually okay All is well in this present moment Where does suffering kick in if when our Mind pulls us out of the present moment And then Replays what has happened or creates a Story or a narrative around what has Happened Oh your wife has had an affair it will Then add on these layers of perception On top of reality so the reality is She's had an affair this layer of Perception is I'll never build to get through this I Can't handle this as too painful
There must be something wrong with me Because this has happened I could have Prevented it What should I have done earlier or Quicker or thinner It's this story this narrative which the Mind creates around it which is like Adding gasoline onto a fire and it will Just burn stronger and more brightly And what I've have come to experience is That continually coming back to the Present moment The first part and acknowledging reality A lot of the time we try and fight Against reality but reality will begin To sink in The more that we accept what has Happened externally but also internally What's coming up within me where and in The beginning in that instance there was So much sadness and of course there was Anger which was fused into it And so it's then acknowledging the Emotion And allowing it to pass and that's a Process So I actually have an area framework so The a is to acknowledge What is happening around you within you That are is to begin to release this Feeling To continually let it flow through you To recognize that the feeling is within You now if a feeling is within you it's
Then our responsibility to deal with it It would have been too easy to feed you Know you made me feel this way because Of what have you have done and so I'm Going to blame you But what happens in that instance is I Give away all my power Responsibility is the ability to respond The ability to act as the definition of Power And so responsibility holds great power If I hold my responsibility I hold my Power now wear the mind off in Fights against that is it conflicts Responsibility with fault And the mind doesn't want to hold on to Fault because it's too heavy for it But analogy would be like for your Do you ever go walking or do you ever Yeah high level yeah if you're going for A look for a stroll a little stroll head Down to Pratt use my prep coffee Subscription to get free coffee you know That kind of thing yeah yeah and so Imagine you're going on but imagine in Fact you're in the countryside yeah and The storm will bring back the summer Storm hits now whenever you set off it Was sunny skies It was a lovely like breeze you know Other than the Sun was shining now a Storm is hitting and it's torrential Rain and high winds the weather change Is not your fault it would be ludicrous
If you think it's your fault but it is Your responsibilities how you're going To respond are you going to take out Your jacket and put on a waterproof are You going to find shelter are you going To Even call for someone to pick you up Our feelings it's not our fault okay They've they've Arisen the sadness is Natural based on what had happened But it's my responsibility how do I deal With and manage those feelings next So acknowledge release yeah then the Eyes to inquire into what this event is Triggering within you Because Reality It's okay everything is everything is Just unfolding like we talked about the Universe is just continually unfolding And it has for 13.8 billion years and it Will continue to do so what the Mind Does is it places a Judgment on this event This event is good where this event is Bad This is successor this is failure and if We feel hurt it will have triggered Something within us There's something that your mind is Probably personalizing Or imagining will be the outcome And our task is to figure out what that Is so to give you a little example often
What the mind will do is it will Personalize what the person has done so In this example With my wife at the time having an Affair my mind will personalize it and Say there must be something wrong with Me I'm not mad enough or I'm not good Enough or whatever that may be Truly the principle I work with is that Whatever anyone else says or does tells You nothing about you It only tells you about what is going on Within them within their thoughts and Their feelings My wife at the time didn't take those Actions because of how she viewed me She took it because she was in a place For hurt and fear and we'd lost intimacy And connection Now my responsibility did I play into That context 100 and I'll learn from That and I did and I looked at the part That I played that created a situation Out of which she acted but I'm not Taking responsibility for her action That is more indicative of what she was Going through So once we begin to once the emotional Paths and we can begin to look at this We can actually begin to learn and grow Through it the way that I Define Resilience is the ability to accept Understand process and grow through Emotional pain first of all we have to
Accept and acknowledge it next we have To release and process it then we have To understand it inquire what is my mind Making this about learn from it and then We can grow through it and the final a Is to act to act in line with our values And our vision With a place that we want to go to and The value that we want to hold close to Us on our path Because I've worked with So many Business Leaders and and Visionaries and CEOs who whenever Something Huge or detrimental happens particularly To their business or in a personal life They lose sight of their vision And we all need something To move towards something that is in a Way aspirational And how we do it feel crucial Royal Robin was one of my favorite Quotes is from uh this pioneering rock Climbing and who'd scale Yosemite Because the first one to do it without Anchoring or hammering pins into the Rock surface and creating damage and he Said getting to the top is nothing the Way you do it is everything And I've worked with individuals who've Created multi-billion pound Companies and products Who are deeply dissatisfied and Discontent with where they are because
They're not proud of what they've Created and maybe bringing in a huge Amount of income But they don't feel fully Fulfilled because they've lost something Along the way And so the way we do something staying Close to Who We Are Returning to who we are and moving from That place of freedom and integrity and Grace is part of a fulfilling life for Everybody We we've talked a lot about or you've You've mentioned quite a bit this thing Around uh this idea of returning to who You are yeah and um you know we just Talked about values and vision yes Um How does one begin to figure out what Their Vision or values are Um I guess I've come across exercises And things that you can do for companies Of like you know every company needs a Mission a vision of value values and all That jazz How do you approach that for an Individual The simplest question would be what Would you love Like Ali what Would You Love So if you if we looked at Relationships what would you love to Experience In a relationship
Intimacy closeness together all these Somewhat cliche sounding words that are Making me feel a bit embarrassed even as I say them Um and what is about even talking about Intimacy or closeness that is Embarrassing I think well embarrassing May be the wrong word I think It feels It feels kind of cliche like What what do I want what what would I Love I would love intimacy and closeness I feel like and what's wrong with cliche What's wrong with cliche I feel like I Almost should be able to come up with Something that feels less Cliche more More true to myself I guess I feel like I almost should know what I want and be Able to describe that in more words than Just throwing out a word like Togetherness or something like that So you just started by describing some Of the most powerful meaningful Forces in life Closeness Intimacy connection I do not know any individual who would Not love to experience closeness and Connection An intimacy that's beautiful It's Literally it's like hearing poetry to me Whenever you spoke about that and then
You undermined it And then you completely undermine what You love yeah and what is important to You And actually holding and putting it out There Felt too scary it was no just it was Like yeah keep it in here keep it in Here it's safer here yeah and Potentially your mind might have even Built up an identity around Being unique and doing doing things Differently and having a clear specific Idea of what something is for you and That creates a huge amount of pressure Because you have to have everything Figured out before you even start Try going into relationship with that It's going to be it's going to create Anxiety or it's going to hold us back From even taking a step into it because That's a huge ass I wouldn't even know Where to start with that But if we go back to your truth what was Important to you with intimafine what Was important was connection And And for me then the work would be Continually going going back and knowing And holding our truth and beginning to Act from that place of Truth expressing Our Truth Because you can have Intimacy in in Other areas other than just romantic
Relationship or connection or openness And we can look at okay what is it well If I ask you what is it That in a way would Foster connection or Intimacy In a romantic context or in any Relationship yes yeah or you could think About it I guess I guess for me it's Where we can Enjoy each other's Company without like we can enjoy the Moments where we're doing something but Also the moments where we're doing Nothing yeah Yeah and there's something about that That feels Like yeah that would be really nice yeah Um I always have an image of I love the Idea of going on a long road trip and We're both listening to the same Audiobook and pausing it at moments Where it's like oh did you did it Like that that just happened and kind of Having that experience shared Um I think moments of sharing experience And I think when I was at University I Always just liked studying with people In the room with me even though we were All doing different things but there was A sense of A sense of closeness togetherness
Connection yeah sharing the same Wi-Fi But doing different types of work that Always felt really fulfilling and Meaningful and if I look back at my University experience those were amongst The moments that I looked back on with The greatest fondness those moments of All of us just sitting in the same room Or in the same Library doing our work And I think that is Some of the sense of Connection that I would love to have in Basically all areas of my life yeah That's beautiful And what you described to me Echoes what spiritual teachers and Mystics have been saying for thousands Of years you describe what it looks like And what I heard from is you can be with Someone and you can be doing the same Thing or you can be doing nothing but You're you're there together and all is Well Hmm yeah yeah and in that there is Pure acceptance of the other You could be doing something together You could be doing nothing but you were Seeing the person in front of you and You're fully appreciating who they are And you're not trying to you didn't Describe trying to control or change the Other person you're seeing them and Opening your heart and experiencing the Beauty of who they are in your presence
Even if that's doing nothing And that is love to see the other Appreciate them and acknowledge This beautiful person in front of you And even in your description of being in A library where where people are Together and they're close to each other But they're also independent they might Be doing their own work or they might be Doing their they might be doing their Own thing you know they're sharing the Same Wi-Fi connection but they're doing Something with that Wi-Fi connection With an ancient uh poet Persian poet uh And he describes that love is not to Becoming one but two people being Together in the same place but drinking From their own cup That love is actually like two pillars Of uh building They're both part of the building but They're independent That love is like the Cyprus Tree and The oak tree that are not too close Together that they're overlapping They're not too far apart that there's Just so much distance but they're not in Each other's Shadow they're standing They're close enough together but they Have their own independent Your sense yourself everything you Describe there Some of the most beautiful poetical Mystical Minds have described in
Different ways And that is truth And so whenever we have a better when we Can explore this and begin to understand It it becomes so clear about What potential the next PATH will be Because we're returning to what we would Love most And that's our task for Ali to keep on Returning to what you would love most What would you love most and we allow That to direct the way Is so this might just be my failure of Imagination but With with the whole values think Um people often say that you want to Find a partner who shares your values And to that I've always been a bit like Like surely everyone has broadly similar Values you know living in the same Society if you go to Medical with Someone chances are you value kind of Traditional measures of success chances Are you value honesty and integrity and You don't want to be with someone who's A liar and the the those all seem almost Like table Stakes Um rather than something I guess quite Unique Um What am I kind of missing here do people Have their unique sets of values or yeah I'd say like you're saying at our at our Core
There will be Values of love compassion understanding And that is part of the Of human consciousness you know this Wisdom there's creativity there is an Appreciation for the present moment The difference of Some of us have lost most of us all of Us Have lost Or are not yet back to that place of Truth So if love is truth it all comes back to Really love or fear there are two forces In the world love and fear and we're Either moving from a place of Love or Removing from a place of fear The quest the journey that we talked About the beginnings to return to that Place of love because love is true so We're returning to our place of Truth When we're acting out of Truth we're Moving from a place of love The mind Is based in fear So whenever someone is not acting out Their values it's because they're acting From a place of fear they're acting from A place of mind And we can see where we are From the way that we live our lives I Would say rather than listen to what Someone says about their values just Watch them and see what they do that
Will tell you so much more in terms of Are they living from that place And so to make it simple I would say I Often go back to trying to determine am I moving from a place of Love or am I Moving from a place of fear And the more that we can move from a Place of love the more that we are in Flow with life Life will still be difficult life will Still be challenging but there will be a Sense of ease with what we're Experiencing because we're not fighting It and we're moving through it with more Wisdom more compassion more creativity More Innovation more understanding more Forgiveness more lightness And that's the path Okay it's a lot for a Thursday morning [Laughter] Okay this is why my brother says like When you go to dinner party he always Says keep it light and fluffy light and Airy and I'm like I'll try yeah I mean I'm there one to one with the person Next to me and we're talking about you Know what is the meaning of life The nightmare this is great this is Great um All of this stuff that we've talked About love is truth Etc what does that Have to do with figuring out what your Own values and vision are If you go back to what you would love
That will be your vision What you'd love to create the meaning of Life is to experience life okay That's it fine the meaning of life is to Experience life Experience what this moment when now Yeah that's the this this is it I'm Experiencing this moment with you that In itself is everything So then the question becomes what kind Of experiences do you want to have in Life Well what kind of experience would you Want to have in life what do you want to Experience That's such a uh it's it's I'm finding myself at a loss for words Because it's it's almost too big a Question to And I'm kind of in my mind I'm tempted To well then let's bring it down so then In in your career what would you love to Experience another way of thinking of it What would you love to create and what Will you be experiencing through that Creation what would you love to create In your career I have to create my Minecraft what are you building I think for me personally it's about Um Teaching I love experiencing the feeling Of Learning something new finding a way to
Synthesize it and to teach it to someone Else Um And I would love to experience which I kind Of do and I guess why that's why I do This kind of stuff The freedom to do so on my own terms not Tied to a rotor coordinator or an NHS Foundation trust or whatever the yeah The constraint might be and whenever you Learn something new and you synthesize That information and you pass it on to Someone else What do you experience how does it feel Um the first word that came to mind was A joy but then I thought nah too cliche And then I thought well wait a minute Yeah totally yeah the Dalai Lama and Devlin tutu there's just been a Documentary created On Joy Two of the greatest Spiritual and political Icons over time sitting around to talk About the one word that you just talked About Joy I shouldn't be embarrassed of using That word There's no reason to be embarrassed About anything else like you have so Much wisdom you you see truth and you Talk about it but then you undermine it And throw it away
Don't do that anymore Ellie Don't do that don't undermine your power Same thing Like I would say something yeah I would Say a compliment and then I'd Immediately undermine it by like kind of Turning it into a bit of a joke yeah and That feeling of like oh I I can't be too Sincere because that's that's weird yeah Yeah what would be the worst thing about Being too sincere what would it what Would it say about you It would it's I think it's a vulnerability right yeah It's like putting putting my heart on The line and being leaving it open to Being laughed at be like yeah yeah yeah I get that I totally get in there that's Ultimate vulnerability vulnerability is The ability to be hurt So it's understandable that your mind Will not want you to be hurt If any time you're getting close to Putting something out there That is going to potentially be laughed At or ridiculed or sniggered at or Rejected Or undermined or diminished That's an act of vulnerability and your Mind will protect you from it so what Will it do it'll do it'll do it first Yeah It'll do it first and it'll keep you Safe
But what do we lose by not sharing our Truth we leave everything we lose Connection we lose intimacy we lose Our power like you have so much power I Can feel it in the room with you you're You're immensely powerful and you have Such wisdom and you have such a Brilliant mind and so with you and you Can identify things and you can simplify Them and you can put them out there and You've achieved phenomenal success in What you're doing even when your mind Has been holding you back through Certain fears What would Ali be like if You were moving more and more away from The place of fear and a place of mind And allowing you to flow in at full Force now I'm getting excited and I Don't know anything about your life It's like a river Within all of us is a river And if a river isn't if we look and the River isn't flowing As much Then people think oh I need to try and Increase the force of the river no no You don't watch your have its own power All we need to do is look up stream and See where the Rocks where are the blocks And take those out we take those out we Disidentify with the mind we dissolve Those parts which are holding back that River will flow and it will flow with
More power and more Force than we could Ever imagine This episode is very kindly brought to You by wework now this is particularly Exciting for me because I have been a Full paying customer of wework for the Last two years now I discovered it During you know when the pandemic was in On the verge of being lifted and I'd Spent like the whole year just sort of Sitting in my room making YouTube videos But then I discovered wework and I was a Member me and Angus my team members we Were members of the wework in Cambridge And they have like hundreds of other Locations worldwide as well and it was Incredible because we had this fantastic Beautifully designed office space to go To to work and we found ourselves like Every day just at nine o'clock in the Morning just going to wework because it Was a way nicer experience working from The co-working space than it was just Sitting at home working these days what Me and everyone on my team has is the All access pass which means you're not Tied to a specific rework location but It means you can use any of their Several hundred co-working spaces around London around the UK and also around the World and one of the things I really Love about the co-working setup is that It's fantastic as a bit of a change of Scenery so these days I work from home
I've got the studio at home but if I Need to get some focused writing work Done and I've been I'm feeling a bit Drained just sitting at my desk all day I'll just pop over to the local wework Which is about a 10 minute walk from Where I am I'll take my laptop up with Me I've got some free coffee from there I'll get a few snacks and it's just such A great Vibe and you get to meet cool People I made a few friends through Meeting them at wework and it's just Really nice being an environment almost Like a library but kind of nicer because There's like a little bit of soft music In the background and there's other kind Of startup Bros and creators and stuff In in there as well and it's just my Absolute favorite co-working space of All time it's super easy to book a desk Or book a conference room using the app And it's a great place to meet up with Team members if you're going to Collaborate and you'll live in different Places they've got unlimited tea and Coffee and herbal teas and drinks on tap And they've also got various kind of After work events that happen like happy Hours and yoga and a few other exercise Type things and you can also take in Guests so often when guests will come Over to visit I'll say hey let's pop Into wework and we'll just work from There for the whole day and then we'll
Go out for dinner sometime in the Evening anyway if you're looking for a Co-working space for you or your team Then I'd 100 recommend wework like I Said I've been a pain customer for Theirs for the last two years which is Why it's particularly exciting that They're now sponsoring this episode and If you want to get 50 off your first Booking then do head over to we.com Forward slash Ali and you can use the Coupon code Ali at checkout Ali to get 50 of your first booking so thank you so Much wework for sponsoring this episode I um worked with a Clinical psychologist executive coach Slash more like yeah at one point last Year and I kind of joke to him that like Our sessions felt more like therapy than Executive coaching and he was like oh Man everyone says that don't worry about It this is kind of feeling this is like A similar kind of vibe Um but I'm curious so like for me I I Kind of know that the My I guess personal Vision with my Career is around this teaching idea and This Freedom idea kind of coming Together Um but I'm not in anyone else's head so I don't know what like with with your Clients when you ask them that question Like what are what what sort of answers Do you get from different people around
What's their own vision for their career It'll vary for everyone And so the What it looks like In a way doesn't matter What matches is what do we think we will Achieve through achieving this Okay what do we think this experience Will bring And sometimes when we return back to First principles Actually we see that The outcome is less important what's Much more important is that can I begin To live these principles out now you're Doing already what's important to you When we're talking about what you're Creating is to to learn Finn for five And then teach Beautiful and you're finding different Ways of doing that you can do that in Different on different scales you could Do it one to one or you could do it Reaching millions of people And it brings you a sense of joy That's beautiful we'll then just look at What are the what are the blocks of Of the mind which you're holding us back And it was interesting like you're Saying that we'll begin to hear Different feedback from different people And really it's about identifying our Fears And it's about
Moving from a place of vulnerability Because that's where our power is Vulnerability is the ultimate strength Because it's truth And you cannot Hide truth the Buddha said it for there Are three things which cannot be long Hidden fun the moon and Truth And it's powerful the truth connects With people Whenever I did a Podcast that I talked about the story of My ex-wife Uh on the diary field with Steve The the number of people that have been In touch and openly and courageously Shared Similar experiences similar stories Whether or not they're the one that Experienced it or they were the one Which Carried out the affair but they opened Up and they They show True vulnerability in in Sharing what they're going through Because I believe the truth connects With people If you share truth it transforms Whenever we're even in an argument with A partner often we go in with anger But you'll learn anger about Something which has happened now we get Caught up in the level of the Mind I'll give you a personal example I'm in
A new relationship now being in the Relationship for about six months And There was this one topic which I could sense just kept on triggering me And I was triggering anger within me and I couldn't figure it out And when I was coming in with anger I Was coming in with judgment and when I Was coming in judgment she was feeling Misunderstood unheard isolated and her Mind was feeling attacked because I was My mind was attacking hers So then she would defend and she would Attack and then I would get more angry And I would have to keep on Taking a step back until I until I was Able to see what this was about because If we're ever angry or hurt or upset That something was happening within us We're not seeing reality clearly there's Something within a mind of adding on to It and I was taking I was taking something from the past of What happened into the present and when I truly shared how I felt the truth was The truth was I was scared I was scared Of getting hurt I was scared of Feeling that pain I felt three years ago Because it was So excruciating That my mind will want to protect me From that
When I shared that we take something From the unconscious into the conscious From the darkness into the light it Dissolve suddenly the fear begins to Dissolve itself and the other person can Connect and then she approached with Compassion and understanding and Closeness and we reach a deeper level of Intimacy and connection and openness But it only came from vulnerability So for you what would What could being vulnerable look like I think in my relationship it could look Like Feeling more free to say what I'm Feeling and yeah Yeah I think that's an area where I I sometimes struggle to know what I'm Feeling Um and like we kind of alluded to that Earlier on in in the conversation Um I was gonna gonna follow that I feel Like Often like someone will ask me how do You feel about X and I would immediately construct a Cognitive representation of yeah that Rather than And you know like my my sister-in-law Might be Might say something like huh it's Interesting that that sentence started With I think rather than I feel totally And I'll be like
God damn it you're right Um yeah I think I really I really Struggle to articulate how I feel about Stuff because I think the mind is always So Yeah and yeah just on in in overdrive Yeah Um Ali you're not alone One passion I've seen when you have an Individual like yourself that has such a Brilliant mind that's so Intelligent and sharp and Powerful It begins to in a way Rule the show because it's a phenomenal Powerhouse of an engine And The Mind operates on a cognitive level So it will continually be pulling you Into your mind and you'll be Experiencing the world through your mind And what does that mind do it will Create Concepts and ideas and constructions and It will understand where things placing Together I valued my mind so much that I was Always again living in my mind And what I wasn't connecting to is how I Felt I had no idea how I felt for years I had no idea I wouldn't even know how to answer the Question And in my 20s what happened with all This emotion was built up what would
Happen truthfully is I'd get drunk and It would all come out As rage as anger And we have these moments where in my 20s during the day I would just been Seem so Serene Serene and Cam and then With alcohol it was just this anger Would burst through because I didn't Know how to connect to my emotion I didn't even know where to start I Didn't Know how to live from that space and That became part of my journey of living From and connecting to my heart knowing What is here And over time we become more achin to it And we can pick we can pick up even More granularity with it go if something Feels off or I can feel hurt or I can Feel I can feel tightness or tension and If you want you can even start with the Body you know you can start to notice When do I feel tight or tense if Something doesn't feel right it's like Something's a little bit off Just even beginning to start with the Body and then we can move to beginning To notice oh if there's something in my Body what do I what do I feel What do I notice a stirring there we can Just begin to change it a little bit More And it's with so many individuals I work With like they're doing phenomenally
Well in their career but often what has Happened is just like you described Their biggest challenge Is sharing how they truly feel And a lot of the time There's actually a bit of a gender Pattern which I've seen Men really struggle to know What they feel and how they feel and if They can identify anything into anger But but anger is a superficial emotion It's almost like a secular emotion it'll Be a masking a deeper hurt And then we'll explore With courage and with openness and with Vulnerability safely what is underneath That They will be hurt there that you mind Trying to protect you from and it's Easier to feel anger anger is very Empowering where I've hurt a very Opening Or with often with females they know how They feel or they're not sharing it They're not truly sharing how they feel To the person they love or sharing truly What they're experiencing at work And it's holding them back and Eventually though we reach a point where We think of our thickness we can't Continue anymore because the pain of not Connecting to our truth and expressing Our Truth is too much Because we go back to that Quest what
Will life do it will bring more and more Situations into your life to get you to Look at this look at this alley look at This I don't think it's a coincidence that Your girlfriend said there are times That you share and then you pull it back And I've said the same thing today life Is saying to you Ali Look at this I love you Ali and this is Part of your path Take a little lick And it's beautiful you have people Around you and you have a partner who is Also to bring in another aspect of love Can be a part of your emotional and Spiritual and psychological growth Now you've got two people who feed each Other who love each other who share and Are supporting each other to grow and You can grow together That's a blessing Yeah Yeah Doesn't mean it's easy though yeah it Doesn't mean it's easy and look I made The same mistake one of the aspects I've Learned from most through my 10-year Relationship and marriage if I didn't Share how I truly felt Because I was afraid of hurting the Other person I didn't want to create conflict I didn't want to create pain for someone
Else and I was afraid that if I said how I truly felt that is what would happen But instead I moved away from my truth And everything fell apart What's the balance there like You know people some people would say The key to a relationship is to not Share how you truly feel about Everything like if she asks you if you If she looks nice in the dress the Answer is always yes kindling there's That kind of people are clearly being You know a bit flippant when they say Things like that but I feel like there Is like a truth there underneath that Around If you were to sample 24 times a day how Do I currently feel about my partner and About my relationship that feels like an Almost unhealthy level of sampling Um to what extent do you agree or Disagree Anytime we feel Anger frustration Uh resentment disappointment Uh anything that we call a negative Emotion towards something else there's Something wrong with you Oh Okay interesting The mind will blame the other person What I'm saying is There is something within you're wearing A lens or a filter right now we go
Through life with a clear lens and as we Go through life we're driving the car a Little bits of dirt flick up and they Hit onto the windscreen and now we're Looking at the landscape saying gosh That bit's dark gosh that bit's muddy no No no there's nothing wrong with outside It's your lens that's what we need to Clean first So It's about recognizing anytime I feel Emotion there's something happening Within me It's within me it's my responsibility to Look at Where people go wrong if they think that Sharing truth means Do you know what you're really pissing Me off because you keep on doing this And I feel like you don't care and I Feel and you're not respecting me And you're not good enough eventually What we think and you need to change so We've got a little mini dictator in all Our heads and what it says is reality Isn't right I want to feel safe and Secure So what I'm going to try and do is I'm Going to try and control reality I'm Going to try and control what's Happening around me And I'm going to try and control you so That you don't trigger me No no no no no no no no
Where there's love there's no control Where there's control there's no love Moving deeper we want to see what it What is being triggered Within Me What is what is the hurt really about I'm I'm sharing that I'm realizing that For instance I Feel unloved And that is not your fault That is don't just saying I want to Share something and I'm not saying your Fault this is something I'm I realize I Need to work on but there's a part of me That feels unlovable And feels like I don't deserve to be Loved and you know I'm going to work on Figuring out maybe where that came from And I'd love to work on healing that And whenever you say or do this you're Not doing anything wrong and I Understand and maybe we'll get to know What your intention is behind it But I personalize it or my mind Personalize it and it makes about Something else and you know in those Moments when I feel alone and And hurt I'm gonna try and not attack you and I'm Gonna try and share how I feel Because when we share truth of how we Truly feel When someone opens their heart it opens The other person's heart Anytime you begin to like open up a
Little bit about how you felt Ali I felt Even more connected to you and I was Fascinated and I wanted to know more About it And if we weren't making a podcast and I Wasn't also wanting to bring something For people to listen to I would just sit down and we would want To know more for hours Because it's beautiful because truth is Beautiful Even amidst the pain and what we see is Insecurity there's still Beauty It's like kinsugi that Japanese art form These Beauty and perfection in the Imperfection And so part of us creating compassion For that So I imagine you have Clients who For them expressing their inner truth Um could potentially Cause a drop in the value of their Business Um and I sort of just to to use an Example that's that that I see a lot we Have however many students on our kind Of this course that I run to teach People how to be YouTubers and at the Start of someone's Journey I'm always Like look just share whatever you want Make videos about anything it's it's not Going to get views anyway so don't worry About it like you know just lower the
Bar as much as possible but at some Point Um you get to a an area where it's like Oh damn I've got I've got an audience Now and I've built an audience by making Videos about Finance Um but I really want to make a video Talking about mindfulness or talking About yoga or talking about the power of Psychedelics or something like that But my my business my channel is about Finance and so while I might feel pulled To share my truth around meditation I am Worried that The finance audience won't care and that It will cause my channel to be become Less good in the business term fall and Stuff all of that kind of thing and I Imagine if I were working with I don't Know a billion dollar CEOs that that They have to be very careful about the Truth they put out into the world for Fear that it will reflect badly on their Brand or their business or their team Like if I had a company of 50 people my Truth might be I actually want to fire all of them and Just go back to just being me making Websites for freelance clients yeah but Sharing that truth would be pretty Disastrous for my company and everyone Would Mutiny and et cetera Etc yeah so I Guess my question is how do you balance The sharing of your internal truth and
Living true to that with The market yeah they were yes It's an understandable situation it's One that I see time and time and time Again in multiple areas and multiple Ways We can even take one example one step Back in terms of individuals who are Leaving University And You can be looking at two options on one Page very well another one doesn't Jimmy Caro put it in a beautiful way What's your price How much would you have to be paid to Give up on what you love 50 Grand a year when you're coming out 100 Grand a year 150 200. There'll be a point where without Awareness Will pay the price It's the same question at any level What's your price What are you willing to let go of to Follow truth And some people the price is too high For them 100 million 200 million 500 Million No no I'll I'll forgo Truth For The external
And that's a choice And it's not saying that it's a bad Choice there is no good or bad just both Will have consequences Now does it mean Oh suddenly you quit your company And everything falls apart No we also live in this world it's about Being In the world but not of the world so you May see that actually this is truly Where I want to move into and is there a More strategic way is there someone that I could bring in who could begin to take Over the role that I'm doing or do I Want to continue to grow on scale or Would I be happy keeping the company at This level or is there a way of me doing Both at the one time or is there there Could be An infinite number of possibilities to Even take a step closer towards you Moving from a place of Truth I'm not saying throw the baby out the Bathwater I'm not saying suddenly create Radical change You may and that is may work but what I'm saying is if we can just take one Step closer to connecting to your tree Things will begin to change in and of Themselves and I feel and look There's a number of examples that come To mind and they reach a Crossroads We're literally
They're out of critical juncture in Their career and let's say the company Okay well the company is worth 200 300 million but if they go down a Certain road we could be worth we could Go public could be four or five billion The mind Will say well most likely go public with Awareness I've met individuals who have Chosen not to do that Because they've lived it for the last One years two years three years four Years and it isn't what they expected it To be and yes you have more wealth than You have more Financial Security and you Have more and more and more but inside Is less and less and less And you're feeling more disconnected and More out of align with who you are and Will reach a point where these Individuals where with awareness to say No that is not what my life is about my Life is not about keeping the 50 people In the company happy my life is not About doing something for someone else Because they say you're good at it You're good at Ali for do it and do it Again and do it again and don't leave it Don't don't change lane Foreign Is in doing what they love and then Whenever that may change they can they Can they continue to move to what they Love and often they end up being
Successful in that area too Okay well I'm doing you know marketing And that might be worth X but who knows You can move into meditation and you Could be making X to the power of four but your mind Won't see it that way it wants to keep You safe That's all I'm saying is The more we have awareness the more we Can sense when we're coming from a place Of fear and when we're coming from a Sense of Freedom and love Then we can use the tool which is the Mind which is brilliant you would have Much better ideas about probably how you Could pivot in that way because you Understand you know the industry or you Understand psychology or you have that Intimate knowledge You know how things work you'll be Creative you're able to take two Different parts and bring them together So you will then find a way you then use Your mind to say okay mind this is what I would love to achieve what I'd love to Create help me find a way your mind will Find it it will work with you okay Ali This sounds like an adventure let's do It So it's like you're You know that question I'll tell you Around how do you figure out your vision
Your values that's based on your own Internal truth And then the Journey of moving in that Direction well that's that's a path of The mind can figure out yeah absolutely Absolutely your mind will become your Best friend it will help you along the Way but if continually moving back to Seeing at what point am I now moving More towards the place of fear because The more that we create the more we have To lose yeah In a way it's easier when you're at the Beginning of your career and you've got That happy go lucky well what's worse That could happen But then we build and we create and then We have structures which begin to keep Us in place or we have structures in our Relationships which begin to keep things Static but life is not static life Continually flows Life is like the river Whenever we keep trying keep life as it Is it's like taking a bucket going to The Niagara Falls taking the water and Saying oh I've got the Niagara Falls in My bucket yeah no no no You just took away the magic of the Water because you tried to control it And put it in a box and keep it there But life flows so if you keep on flowing With your truth it will keep you and you Will have
You will often end up in a place that You never even imagined in the first Place but it's more brilliant and more Bright and more fulfilling and more Challenging than ever before but you Love it because it's your choice and you Lived your life on your terms with your Agency and your Independence and that's Something that you even talked about Before you want to be the author of your Own story There's a I had dinner with a friend Like last week and Um he runs this uh agency managing Creators influencers YouTubers and I Asked him to analyze a few like a few a Few YouTube channels of some other Friends of mine and there was something He said around this like he wasn't he Was analyzing a friend's Channel and he Was like you know this friend Um he needs to uh be more experimental With his content and he said at this Stage the guy's probably thinking You know I've got I've got this type of Video that's doing well that's getting Lots of views but it's not really what I Want to do forever and he's probably Feeling like he's he can't experiment Now because he's got his Lane And the advice that this guy gave people Who runs this agency he was like I've Seen this time and time and time again When you're early in your career like as
A YouTuber or whatever You can take way more risks yeah at the Point where every video is getting 500 000 views it becomes way harder to take Risks and what he said is that which is Mirror is almost exactly what you said Which is what's your price Um Are you willing to pay the price of Quitting your day job so that you've Created a new day job for yourself in Your YouTube channel where you're only Allowed to make content about Finance Even though you fundamentally don't want To do it and if that's a choice you make That's fine but recognize that it's a Choice yes and recognize that there's a Price yes and I think that analogy kind Of the way you described it as well Connects to I just see so many occasions in my life Where There's been a choice between two things Both of both have different kinds of Consequences one is more Internal truth the other one is more External validation yes and in some Cases I've gone for the external Validation choice in other cases have Gone for the truth choice and yeah both Of our consequences And we live in a world of polarity in The law polarity is that we can only Have North if we have South we can only
Have left with right we can only have Joy because we have sadness so we can Only have lightness because we have Darkness we can only have External validation because internal Security exists And on this path Remember we will experience and go Through and see what it's like on one Side to be able to return back To the last so it's not even about Judging the times that we do make the Choice towards validation or attention Or Money or security or status or power It's just seeing that that will be a Part of our path And through that we can gain deeper Insight and see what it brings and what It does not And see that we have to experience this In order to Experience the other side and with Greater awareness we can then move to What is most true and right for us And that's the path yeah holding both we Don't if not even rejecting one and Demonizing one and then glorifying Another it's just seeing which one fits Well within me which one is the one I Want to begin to move towards which one Yeah move me in the direction that truly On an intuitive level is right for me Yeah
Yeah I find that these days I try and Like whenever I'm on a flight and that And I don't have Wi-Fi I sit down with Like a journal or an iPad and a journal And just like try and figure out you Know I sometimes I'll just like pose a Question at the top of the page Um what do I want from my business what Do I want from my health what I want for My relationships I just kind of write it Out and there was one of these Journaling sessions a couple a few Months ago that led to me realizing that Or what I want from the business is not To Continue to run This YouTuber course even though it Makes tons of money actually what I Want is the freedom to explore topics Other than this because I've been Talking about this for three years Interesting and now We didn't just decide to pull the plug Immediately but we decided you know what Let's make the next cohort the last one Let's turn it into a you know the the Mind and the team found a strategic way Of getting to that truth yes and I was a Bit worried that the team would be like No that's a bad idea but actually the Team will like great it's really useful For us to know what you actually want so We can actually move towards that yeah And they were like you know we wish you
Would tell us more what you actually Want I was like that's surprising Yeah yeah beautiful and Powerful when You're describing that I had shivers Down my spine and for me that's one of The signs when I hear truth I feel that I will be monster it truly connects Ali That's massive You had this YouTube course which was Bringing in X which was a structure that Had been created and Was probably Offering and does offer an amazing Product and service And stepping away from that is not easy Like even to think about the courage That that takes to even contemplate it To even allow it to grow as an idea to Even then explore and move in that Direction because you essentially then Connected to what would I love This life is short I've lost people close to me that makes You realize how short life is If we're going to Give up who we are in our truth and Moving from that place of love To me that is something which is the Greatest strategy But to take moments like that Ah like literally it opens my heart and It connects with me and I'm like that's Beautiful alley that's beautiful Not because of the outcome but because
Of you are you're following you you're Doing you you're following the truth no Matter where it takes you You're following that truth and the and Life reality will take care of the rest You follow the truth and the rest will Fall into place that's our only task you Follow the truth and the rest will fall Into place yeah Even as even even as I was describing This YouTuber example my mind was Thinking oh this is a bad example it's Too trivial this guy's talking about Kind of losing people and like wife Cheating on him and I'm just Talking about this shitty YouTube Example like why would anyone care and Then you said that you felt the truth And I felt like validating I was like oh Maybe I should have shared that because That was my truth But the mind is still kind of thinking That yes yeah this no remember the mind Will do that that's the nature of the Mind you can't change the nature of a Lion the nature of the mind if it will Be fear-based and it will doubt What you are thinking about and it will Judge it yeah I wouldn't expect any Otherwise That's what my mind would do but I've Created so much distance and separation From my mind and I've ignored it for so Long it stops just stop talking
Just going quiet how do you create that Distance By continually recognizing when it is Speaking recognizing that fear yeah and Then going down into that place of Truth Yeah and and still taking action that's What you did there right your mind said Oh terrible example but you still did it Ali and that's the point you still did It you still took that action and it Connected with me That's beautiful that's powerful that Begins to Show your mind that it's not in control That actually you have a deeper wisdom And for whatever reason that That example came to you and you shared It I'm Inspired by that I'm now going to go back and think what Are the ways in which I'm getting tied Into something and should be listening More to that truth like Ali did Beautiful you just changed my life Literally I'm gonna go back and think on That because there will be a way that I Am and I already have an idea of what it Might be What's the idea The idea is that what I'm the way that Right now I'm in my comfort zone In that I Work one to one and I love it and I work
With people who write respect and admire And it's it's such a privilege to be a Part of that journey and there's a part Of me that's saying Share more in a way where you're in Serving by having conversations like This I've not done a podcast in Two years for me this was one step to I should say I've done a podcast of this Of this uh of this type before Because it's a part of my mind that says Don't don't area stay small Don't come in here and tell Ali who's Got You know a huge following who's Respected and admired in this area don't Begin to ask him questions it's his show and what you're gonna come And ask him questions about his life my Mind will Will will do the same things For the things that it's most afraid About So whenever I say yes it goes quiet but Then right now I can sense what or that Is at least what my mind would have said I can tell already what my mind would Have said it would say all these things It'll say no error you're not Who are you who are you to talk about Truth That's so interesting yeah because for Me like what my mind was saying for this Podcast was like oh damn this guy's
Really cool he's an expert like he's got He's got like the spiritual thing the Scientific thing what the hell do I know About any of this stuff am I kind of Gonna be able to follow the thread of The conversation in a way that makes Sense for the listeners and in a way That he feels like he's been respected And that I want him to go away thinking That this was a good interview and that Like I knew my and I asked good Questions and it's just a constant like Because we both have human minds and We're both connected in our Humanity by By the nature of the mind it's the exact Same Ali we're like it's just a mirror In front and most people you meet the Exact same they're just a mirror in Front and the path isn't remember Getting rid of the mind it's moving to a Place where we then just follow truth I've only been able to say what I said Today because I'm just following my intuition And whether it was good or bad or there Are points that were interesting or Points that were boring or the points Where the audience stays or they don't It doesn't matter Because it's about me moving from a Place of Truth and if someone benefits From it that's beautiful and if they Don't that's okay too and if they like Me for it that's okay and if you hate me
For it that's okay too Because that isn't real The only Thing which is real is truth So we're all on a journey you're on a Journey Ali I'm on a journey and there Will be parts will be holding us back And the journey never ends As soon as we think we've achieved it That's when we're in trouble and that's Where we're going to get hit the hardest Now continual growth I have so much to Work on so much to grow through so much To move from and at the same time I am Exactly where I'm supposed to be Exact same with you And where you will go Is just the beauty of of Life the Meaning of life is experience life it's Like we're on a roller coaster It's been unfolding for 13.8 billion Years that will continue for trillions Of years we're just getting to see what The next part of the roller coaster is Where it will take us A man is a gift How did how did you get so good at this You're like your your Vibe is uh like For one of a better word very Zen and Wise and When you said you were 40 I was kind of Surprised because the way you're talking Is kind of what I would more expect from Someone like a sad Guru or you know uh
Spiritual teacher who's like in their 70s or something like that Um when were you like this when you're Like 20 like how did how did this kind Of that was a nightmare yeah In order to find ourselves they have to Lose theirselves and I and I lost myself And I've lost myself many times in Multiple ways and And for whatever reason Life is just continually This will sound ah I was nearly going to Do what you were you were going to do I Was going to say this is gonna sound Cliched my mind was just about to yeah Undermine what I'm gonna say because It judges what I'm about to say in terms Of how I'll be perceived life loves all Of us and life love itself we are If life is The dancer we are the dance And the sense that I've always Felt is that God or the universe or life Loves me and even in the times when I've Suffered the most There's still love there and there's Love that will support me through that And again it goes back to that sense of Not God why is this happening but God Where are you taking me it's it's a part Of a bigger picture and I just can't see That picture right now now the mind Again like we said it tries to take a Snap judgment and determine it as good
Or bad With a then story of the farmer I don't Know if you're aware of it but Essentially a farmer his horse runs away And all the all the neighboring Village Uh people come and say off such bad luck And it says good luck bad luck who knows And they seem a bit perturbed by it They're confused by it or bemused by it And then the horse comes back but it Brings ten other wild horses with it oh The villagers say that's amazing what Good luck good luck bad luck who knows Then one day his son is riding trying to Train one of the wild horses kicks off He falls and breaks his leg the Villagers come oh what terrible luck Good luck bad luck he knows The uh Sun is now lying in bed he's injured the Army comes through and they're taking Young men to for conscription to the Army they see that he's injured so they Leave him villagers come oh my goodness What amazing luck we know the answer Good luck bad luck who knows The mind will assign each Moment of good or bad success or failure But we're not seeing the bigger picture It would be like taking a book Opening up to a page reading one line And saying oh my goodness this is a Horrific book this is a terrible big This is awful this is the worst book
I've ever read we've only read a line We take another big can we open up and Wow this is a beautiful big I know Exactly how it's going to end No no no no no No that's just a line we take this Moment in our lives and we say this is Awful this is terrible I can't get Through this no no no no no no no part Of it is beginning to take a step back And see there is so much I do not know And that's Faith that's trust that's Trust that this is unfolding And not only that all will be well but All is well that moment of what happened Yes at the time I would say it was awful Terrible painful it's the best thing That ever happened to me I wouldn't change it I wouldn't undo it I had to go through that to grow and Evolve as a person because I'd lost Myself I wasn't connected to my truth And now I will not give that up Not for anything And I've met Um in a beautiful relationship where I'm Experienced the depth of sharing Vulnerability I've never had before I Never would have had that because I was Stuck in my structure and life came and Said you know what all right you're not Gonna move I wasn't going to I made a violin of two commences I was
Staying there it was the only way that Life was able to shift me onto a Different trajectory And it happened and it happened through Me And it's led to This path which is still continuing Still growing and I don't know what will Happen next But as long as I follow the truth Reality will take care of the rest Um we've talked a lot about Um kind of feelings emotions and stuff And the impression I get from from the Stuff you've said is that you know the Feelings are almost The truth that we need to connect with Um but then in for example Stoicism and in some other schools of Thought there's the idea that well Feelings are a bit of a myth there are Only really four feelings like Um Discussed pleasure Um salience and like inattention or Something like that and everything else Is uh the mind or culture or Society Putting labels and constructs on top of Fundamentally just these four things What's your take on how True or quote valid or quote real Feelings and emotions are Um in this kind of in the in this Arena I put more and more value on my
Experience Are emotions real I experience emotions and so that is a Part of my internal reality What we do with what we're experiencing Is when the Mind becomes involved it Will then Categorize and create Delineations and structures in order to Try and understand reality And that is an act of the Mind With emotions we even know that Labeling an emotion for instance Decreases the intensity of the emotion So on a neural level If you're experiencing anger and you're Able to identify I am experiencing anger It actually Strengthens the circuitry in the Prefrontal cortex and will dampen down The older more Primal parts of the brain Which are responsible for emotion like They make Glenn and so even labeling an Emotion can decrease its intensity the Words that we have for an emotion impact Our experience of it there are tribes Around the world that have Labels or emotions that we don't even Know And the Scientific understanding is that they Will experience emotions that we don't Because we don't even have a word for it And so
We could get lost in this but Essentially what I bring it back to is What is most effective Even if we tie into high performance High performance is taking effective Actions effective times When we often make poor decisions is When we're acting from a place of Emotion When fear goes up intellect goes down So If we're looking at wanting to make a Strategic move within our business or we Want to Create something within a relationship Part of it is knowing and sensing and Feeling the emotion that's there because I know that if an emotional is there now Is not the time to make a decision In the beginning you've got one problem And I could be the work issue at hand As soon as the emotion gets involved You've got a second problem Which is all the feelings around it the Anger the frustration the disappointment The feeling of disrespect It's only once I've created space for The feeling and allow that to dissolve Will I then look at what that initial Problem in the world is And I suppose as part of your Aria Framework sort of acknowledge release And then you can inquire as to what's The trigger here
Precisely the first step is the Acceptance part it's allowing the Emotion to be there to recognize Victor Acknowledge and to release it until Outflow through this only then do we Have access to the greatest part of the Brain which is the The part responsible for the the Judgment of a situation holding multiple Options in mind assessing and weighing Up the balance impulse control that Executive control of what to do next That comes into play and we can use the Mind of the tool to reflect and the Stokes would do that with a great time During the day where they would reflect On on their life or on what makes a Meaningful day or on What they're taking for granted or on Where their worker growth is But the first part has to be the Acceptance allowance before the change Can take place We can only change what we accept Let's say you're working with with one Of your clients or even for yourself And you're having I guess you're having an issue in the Business or in your personal life where You're feeling kind of these emotions Coming up and Taking you away from from the present Moment what What are some examples of what this kind
Of acknowledge release Inquirer thing Looks like Can you think of A time where you felt maybe in the last Week or two where you felt it difficult A difficult or challenging emotion a Negative emotion where you felt anger or Frustration or hurt Okay so in my relationship for example Often there'll be times where or Sometimes there'll be times where she's Busy with something or other at work and Hasn't replied to a message for a while Mm-hmm And My mind will start thinking oh have I Done something wrong Um And usually like I feel like I've been Drinking this doseism Kool-Aid for like A decade and so I can Then almost override that with another Part of the mind with the voices of like You know Ryan holiday and all of the original Stoics in my mind being like Oh you know Control the things under your control Like her response is not in my Controller all of all of that kind of Stuff with them come and make me well Sort of somewhat override that but I Think the core feeling at it is still oh Have I done something wrong here So it's a very simple example but for
Instance uh Uh and in this case the gender was the Wife asking the husband are you able to Come home tonight at 5 45 And he's CEO of a company And he was explaining this to me he got He's like I just felt so frustrated and Angry because she knows I can't come Home at 5 45 on a Tuesday because I've Got that board meeting and I'm saying Look why are you putting this pressure On me in order for me to be home Whenever you know I can you need to be More understanding and he got frustrated Angry at her and then she got defensive And got upset with him And it led into a spiral whenever we Began to break it down What he was doing was he was acting from The emotion So the three things or three traps that People fall into one is they try and Avoid the emotion the emotional pain we Try and avoid it reject it negate it Push it down And just not feel it But what happens in that instance is That it's like Putting a suitcase into a basement it's Not disappeared but we put in another Suitcase in another suitcase and Eventually our whole basement is filled And it's going to start coming out we're Not going to put anything else in and a
Little bit like pressure building up in A volcano eventually it then just erupts So they're all these instances Beforehand where he have Felt frustrated and just said okay do You know what I'm just going to to stay calm don't React and he just moves on but he hasn't Connected to the emotion and so it's Still there and it builds up and over Time frustration and anger hardens and Turns into resentment So now we're seeing through a different Lens and filter so one is we're trying To avoid the pain the second mistake is That we fuse with the pain we create a Story or a narrative around it ah my Wife doesn't understand she doesn't care She's not shown me the respect that I Should have and it's created a narrative Around Respect or not being loved the third is React out of the painting and in that Instance the person then got angrier Snapped in at later conflict and then That conflict leads to a a rupture in The connection in the relationship Part of the path in a very simple Example of disease to acknowledge what Am I experiencing okay there is Anger of Frustration remember anger is the Surface level What is beneath then once we begin to You know acknowledge and release it and
Then he and I together can explore it Beneath the Anger was actually guilt The truth is he feels bad Why does he feel bad he feels bad Because there's a part of him that feels Like I should be home at 5 45. And there's a part of him that feels Like he's not being a good enough father Or not being good enough Husband Now the mind will try and protect from That because that's a hard truth to hold So what will it do it will then Turn it around and attack the other Person Finger making me feel like a bad Husband are you making me feel like I'm Not doing enough no no no no no we can Only Experience what we judge ourselves if we Feel hurt by something it's because part Of a part of us believes that it's true So repeat that if we ever feel hurt or Upset or resentful or angry about Something part of us is holding that Same judgment towards ourselves If I said Ali You're a burrito How are you feeling just kind of amused Yeah yeah It's almost quite comical yeah what you Will not say is what are you calling me A burrito I'm not a burrito no no how
Could you think I'm a burrito I've never Been a burrito I don't have I don't have Guac I don't have beans like this is This is outrageous How could you how could you even think That No no you're not gonna say that because There's no part of you that believes That you're a burrito yeah no part of You you know that's not true yeah As soon as a partner says something Which even Intimates that I feel like You're not giving enough that will only Hurt if part of us feels that we're not Giving enough to you Yeah it's like with Like online comments the only ones that Sting are the ones that have a grain or More than a grain of Truth to them yes Like if someone says Ali your typing Speed is really slow and be like Your content was better when you were Actually a doctor and you were living a Real life instead of just being a Full-time content creator I'd be like oh Damn he went there yeah yes completely Yeah completely Now whenever it hurts Again remember our mind will try and Protect us from feeling that hurt yeah So then Defend and justify and excuse and try And convince the other person but truly Itself why that is not the case because
It doesn't want to hold that truth even If it's a one percent morsel of belief In that But the level of evolution is in direct Proportion to the level of Truth we can Hold without running away If you can hold that truth and see it We can bring it from the darkness into The light from unconsciousness into Consciousness and it begins to change on Its own Carl Jung said until we bring the Unconscious into the conscious it will Direct our life and we will call it fate It's what we're unaware of or do not Accept or judge or push into the shadow Side which ends up ruling of and Dictating how we behave and act and it Won't be in line with truth because We're rejecting truth we're not holding Truth So it all comes back together you take It back to the example when he could Truly see you know I have guilt that I'm Not being the husband and the father That I want to be And he shares that with his wife and Says you know When you asked me to come home at 5 45 I'm so sorry that I got angry and I Attacked you because it Isn't to do with you Is to do with me because what it brought Up with me is I feel bad and I feel like
I should be home and There's part of me that's judging me for Not being a good enough partner And I'm sorry if that is the case and Something I'm working on That's a conversation that's Vulnerability that's truth that leads to Change that leads to two hearts opening And coming together and saying I see you And even that part that you shared That's okay You have a wound And that's okay because I love you it Goes back to you the way that you Described love what we pulled from Because I see you And I see all the parts that you like in The parts you don't like and it's okay What's the balance between I guess being yourself Versus choosing yourself In the sense of for me my my default Self you know we talked about how the Self is you know Um a result of accidents of stuff my Default behavior is often to prioritize Work at the expense of everything else I Am the happiest person in the world if I've spent five hours in the evening on My laptop from 6 pm to 11 pm Um but that's not really the person I Want to be I want to be a person who has More balance who takes care of their Health and their relationships and who
Views time spent with loved ones loved Ones not as a You know I wanna I'd rather be on my Laptop but more like I'm genuinely happy To be here in the present moment even so That's that's kind of who I want to be But it's not who I am if that if that Makes sense so how do we How do I know which one is more quote Authentic because I find that my mum Often says sometimes that oh you know Ali you know you're you're trying to Change for other people and stuff this Was when I at University I made the Active decision that I wanted to become More confident and charismatic and be More of more outgoing whereas in school I was a massive nerd and played World of Warcraft all evening yeah and so to my Mum that was the the real me and she Would say that you're fine as you are You don't need to change I'd be like no But I want to change like I wanna I Wanna level up that's just better I Think to be more confident I'm going uh Yeah what do you reckon There is the Conditioned self And there is true self There is The mind and identity And there is Spirit What we've come to identify of who we
Are is actually the construction of the Mind The mind is created an identity we enter This world and then the mind is trying To understand Who am I What does that mean who are you what is This world how do they all fit together And it creates an identity and it builds One And it builds certain understandings of The world and what people do and Intentions And it's mapping out this internal world And that is down to the accidents of Birth that is down to like you're saying You know your family your cultural Experiences the place and time in this Universe that we have this opportunity The mind will always do that then there Is true self which is just consciousness And the nature of Consciousness is love Is truth The mind says I need to get everything In place and then I'll feel at peace the Soul says be at peace and everything Else falls into place We've been living from our minds for the Majority of Our Lives though We've been living from that place and We've built up Armory and we've built up Coping mechanisms to navigate The path is beginning to Take off some of that Armory
To see that actually when I connect to Truth and love I will Then see what it looks like you don't Need to figure that out If you can just go down into that place Of Truth and Love You will see What it will look like Because one thing we do know is that the Mind is a terrible predictor of what Will make us happy It's got all these ideas My life has to look like this it should Look like this and then I'll be happy We've got no idea We've got no idea we don't know what's Going to happen in one minute of time So to take away all their configuration For the mind trying to Even choose or a map or or build or be a Lot of Self-improvement is talking about Improving who you are or optimizing who You are which is based on the premise That you are not enough You're not good enough you're not whole Enough you're not You're not enough so you've got to do More of a change to be better and get Being caught in the same trap Move away from mine down into Consciousness into that field of Consciousness tap into that place of Love and into intuition and move from
That place of Truth and then we'll see What it looks like So what does that look like in my Confidence I want to be confident Because I feel like I'm not yet Confident and I would like to be more That way yes yeah This idea that you're not confident is An idea Take away the illusion And then we'll find truth So it's The more that we begin to Drop out of the Mind the more that we Create separation from the mind we'll Just begin to notice oh gosh my mind is Just saying that I'm not confident gosh My mind has created an identity of of Who I am it's got its idea of who Ali is And we can be curious about that and see It from a distance as if you're Observing another person so what is Identity that my mind is created about Ali Who does my mind say that Ali is what Does my mind say Ali can do in kanji Gosh what does my mind judge that would Be inappropriate for Ali to do we just Begin to see we begin to see how the Mind created all these preconceived Ideas and Notions oh gosh it says that He's not confident The more that we create separation from It and we see it and distance from it we
Will then just be moving from truth and The truth is You are neither confident nor not Confident You just are You are neither Brilliant nor not brilliant you just are The mystics would just say I am That's all we can say I am and there is No there's no label that we can attach To something which can capture reality Okay There's No Label which can accurately Capture Ultimate power and love there's no name For it it's just pure power you are pure Power you're pure even that's just a Name or an idea but you're just pure Power and And and energy And we'll see where that energy can go But when we move from that place even The idea of confident and confident Doesn't make sense anymore It's like what You know color is the number seven That doesn't make sense that's not who I Am that's not that's not what I am It's just then more ramblings of the Mind You move from that place of power And you will all that will happen is it Will be unfoldings and you'll just begin To
So if we if if we if we turn to Confidence then into something more Concrete like Ability to play finger Style on the Guitar Ability to play finger finger Style on The guitar you know that kind of that Kind of music Such an ability yeah so you can Accurately assess yeah what if my level Of ability in terms of playing the Guitar Yep and I can choose to actively improve That ability or increase that ability if I want to yes similarly if I like Confident is A bit Dodge but if I were to think Instead of Being confident which is like a almost Like a character trait that is has a Value judgment on it because more Confident is generally better uh yes Society judges but instead of it Thinking at thinking a specific skill of Public speaking while doing Presentations specific ability to go to A pretty girl and talk to her specific Ability to Whatever completely those are then areas In which I can decide okay I actually Want to work on my presentation skills Therefore I'm going to watch some YouTube videos and do some practice yes But I'm not
Using that as a way of thinking Therefore I am currently unconfident Because anyway that also becomes a Self-fulfilling prophecy Completely so we can build up individual Skills And say the the key part though is just Seeing when the mind is making judgments And being able to see that as just the Nature of your mind which is a tool Because whenever you live from a place Of No mind or just live from a place of Presence You're not even thinking about Confidence or not confident so if I Think about me right now How am I coming across as confident or Not confident I'd have to make a Judgment I don't know Like potentially some people might say Yes or no it doesn't matter I just need To be me If I think about you right now are you Coming across as confident or not Confident again I think people have Different I would say you're coming Across as yeah confident with With the way that you're holding Yourself other people will say oh well I Think maybe he's holding back it doesn't Really matter if it's just Ally you just Be Ali Full stone
And we can only be who we truly are Whenever we can truly connect to truth When we when we return that Quest Returning to who we are the truth of Who We Are And acting from a place of love maybe I'm being pedantic here but yeah let's Say someone has an important Presentation coming up at work yes and They're like cool I wanna I feel like I'm not particularly confident on stage I'm not particularly confident with Doing this presentation Surely what you're not what you're Saying is not Oh don't worry about practice just focus On being who you are and connecting to Your internal truth and Then or or is that what you're saying or Am I just misunderstanding There'll be different roads okay and There's different routes yeah I'm Talking about if if we're to get Specific yeah but I'm I'm talking about This lifelong spiritual journey okay And That's something which we're continually Working on Are there shortcuts to putting on a good Presentation absolutely You could have a teacher and get them to Show you the hand yeah movements to make The eye contact the intonation The choice of lexicon yeah yes and that
Could be a fascinating skill to develop And so absolutely go on that road and go On that path will that though Take away the real problem which is the Mind believing that we're not good Enough okay yeah will that really Address the mind's doubt that I don't Deserve to shine my light yeah that Actually who I am isn't as good as other People and actually I should say small And if I show up vulnerability I'm gonna Get hurt Don't put yourself out there don't go And speak to the person don't take that Career move don't take that risk to move Away from what's bringing money to move Towards to what I love Yeah nice I like that it's like the I Always chuckle when uh by YouTubers Students are like uh you know I'm just Waiting for for a better camera to Arrive and then yeah and then and then I'll and then my videos will be good Enough for me to make my first one yes I'm always like ah yes let's let's dig Down into that yes because the camera is Not the thing holding you back Completely yeah there's individuals who I've met who've been close to me Incredibly close to my family who Are So powerful That when you're with them you're just Drawn in
It's like uh a magnet and who Can I've met people who can go on stage And speak with such Clarity and with Such connection that you're just Lost in their words And these individuals I'm not known to Go and do a 12-week course on public Speaking Or to researched What to do they may have done that along As well as but what I Know to be true it's because they're Moving From their place of Truth Nice I think that's a great place to end This all right thank you so much thank You I have so many other things to ask You about which will um we'll be able to Do a part two talking about mindfulness And Zen and kind of the things you Learned being an actor and I have all This stuff around here around pain Uncertainty change but we'll save all That for part two um where can people Learn more about you or find more of Your stuff You can check me out on Instagram Uh or on my website cool and we'll put Links to all of those in the show notes Or in the video description thank you so Much Ali thank you for sharing your Truth with me it's been a privilege all Right so that's it for this week's Episode of Deep dive thank you so much
For watching or listening all the links And resources that we mentioned in the Podcast are going to be linked down in The video description or in the show Notes depending on where you're watching Or listening to this if you're listening To this on a podcast platform then do Please leave us a review on the iTunes Store it really helps other people Discover the podcast or if you're Watching this in full HD or 4k on YouTube then you can leave a comment Down below and ask any questions or any Insights or any thoughts about the Episode that would be awesome and if you Enjoyed this episode you might like to Check out this episode here as well Which links in with some of the stuff That we talked about in the episode so Thanks for watching uh do hit the Subscribe button if you aren't already And I'll see you next time bye
