Life Coach: Why Your Energy Drives Your Success In Life – Simon Alexander Ong

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Season 5 Episode 3

The single most important thing this episode will teach you is that the greatest investment you can make is in yourself. My guest is Simon Alexander Ong, a personal development entrepreneur, coach and public speaker who has recently published his debut book ‘Energize’ which became an instant bestseller. In the episode we talk about how the power of coaching unlocks human potential, as well as talking through mini coaching session frameworks that you can apply yourself and final how to access the four dimensions of your energetic field so that you can transform your life for the better. Enjoy!

00:00 Intro
01:49 How did you become a coach?
05:59 The practicalities of coaching
13:01 Selling yourself and authenticity
22:52 How does someone figure out what they actually want
31:16 Whats the difference between vision and mission?
32:49 Coaching role play
42:59 The unregulated side of coaching
46:11 Do you recommend coaching as a career path?
53:21 The power of energy
01:00:09 You book: Energise
01:08:38 How to understand consistency
01:15:57 The question of privilege and enjoyment
01:19:49 How does someone become a coach?
01:27:50 Parting thoughts


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I remember working with a client Recently and she said to me I'm finding It challenging to get clients and I said To her I want you to get me 50 notes What she didn't know is that if she Wants to do this exercise properly she Would never get to 50 notes what you're About to hear is an interview between me And my friend Simon Alexander Ong I know Simon quite well so I gave him a bit of A hard time around this because I think Often it's easy to view coaches and life Coaches and stuff as being a bit scammy And like what the hell is this kind of It's an unregulated industry anyone can Become a coach but as you'll hear in the Conversation like just Simon's responses To all of my attempts at giving him a Hard time are just so good what did Success mean to me and what sort of Impact did I want to have in the world And after searching in different areas And Fields I ended up coming back to the Fact that I really enjoyed helping People Simon has just released this book Energize which is genuinely really good Make the most of every moment I'm just Going to read you out a little bit of His bio Simon Alexander Ong is a Personal development entrepreneur coach And public speaker his clients are from All walks of life but they share one Trait they all believe that the greatest Invest assessment you can make is in

Yourself the first sale which few of us Actually focus on is selling ourselves To ourselves in this conversation we Basically talk about the idea of what It's like to be a personal development Entrepreneur and a coach I went away From the conversation like genuinely so Inspired because I was just so impressed By the way Simon responded to all of the Issues that I tried to throw at him so If you could pick five to six Individuals Dead or Alive who could be Your counsel who would they be I hope You enjoyed this conversation between me And Simon Alexander Ong at the moment According to the YouTube analytics 81 of You who are watching this on YouTube Have not yet hit the Subscribe button And so if you're for example in the now 81 of people who are watching this on YouTube but who are not subscribed to The channel I would love it if you could Do so and would be awesome to get that Number down to 50 and it would be cool To get like 50 50 sub non-sub ratio just Just for fun right Simon thank you so Much for coming on the podcast um we've Known each other for a couple years now First through the Mastermind that we Were on in zoom and then knowing each Other in real life and one thing that I've always wanted to ask you is Um around your I guess guess your Tagline like the the labels that you

Introduce yourself with at least in the Book Simon Alexander Ong is a personal Development entrepreneur coach and Public speaker and initially I would Like and and this would have been like Two years ago when we first met over Zoom I wasn't really sure what that Meant and in my mind like coach was Associated with some kind of Artist kind of vibe like what even is a Professional coach and over time I you Know personal development entrepreneur I Think that's kind of what I am now and My budget artist like yeah and so I'd Love to start with like how how did you End up becoming a coach like what even Is a coach like how how did we get here I was like yourself out here I didn't Know what a coach was in terms of Professional coaching for me my Understanding went as far as Sports you Know if you were going into coaching you Were going to coach a sports team or you Were going to train to go in a field and Perform at your best I didn't know you Could have it in the world of Professional work I actually had my First exposure to coaching I didn't Really know it was coaching at the time When I was at University so while most Students went to work at a local Retailer or department store I actually Met a guy called Peter Harrison he was Doing a talk at the London School of

Economics and he had just quit his job At Goldman Sachs to start a career Coaching business and he he came up to Me and said Simon I like the way you Present yourself and I like the way that You come across would you be interested In teaching students how to get a job in The city I.E how can they interview Better how can they present in order to Wow the people in the room and I I said Well how much you paying and he offered Me good money and so on the side of Studying at University I started helping Students get into University how much Are we talking so not not enough that Was life changing but but enough to Upkeep my student lifestyle okay so to Speak and I continued that into the World of Finance I did it on the side While initially I did it for the money I Started to continue doing it even though I didn't need to do it when I started in The world of Finance purely because I Got enjoyment and fulfillment from Seeing people send me a message back on The phone saying Simon I just landed That offer Simon I got my third job Offer but I never knew that I could Pursue a career in that I thought it was Just a nice way to make some pocket Money and then of course the financial Crisis happened and that prompted me to Ask some deep questions about my future Because I'd only gone into a world of

Finance because I felt that was what Would make me successful so I started Asking myself things such as what did Success mean to me and what sort of Impact did I want to have in the world And after searching in different areas And Fields I ended up coming back to the Fact that I really enjoyed helping People I was that sort of person early Where people when they had a challenge Or dilemma or big question that they Wanted perspective about they would come To me but I didn't know I could make Money from it until I went to a two-day Event it was all about coaching it was About how you could get qualifications To apply this skill into helping people You worked with and that's really where It began so it is it kind of like being A teacher but you're not teaching like Maths or history you're teaching What like yes I would be careful with The the definition here I think when we Teach we're more of a mentor okay uh so For example if I wanted to develop my Speaking I might seek out somebody who Is far more experienced to me in the Public speaking world and so he or she Would be my mentor because I could learn A lot from them they could guide me they Could teach me coaching is less about Telling you what to do and more about Guiding you back to what you already Know through the power of questions you

Know often we we hear the saying that Goes want a better answer ask a better Question and so coaching is all about Asking the right question in the right Moment to uncover the path forward for Your client Okay so who is the sort of person that Might have a coach or might hire you as Their coach sure so in the past it was Probably Exclusively in the domain of c-suite Executive so people at the higher Echelons of management Nowadays it's become far more accessible So we're we're looking at coaching Generally then it's people who want to Move ahead in life people who have an Exciting future in their mind but I Don't quite know how to get there and They need a better challenge you know if We are the only one holding us Accountable then likely we can Procrastinate we can move the goal posts But when there is a coach we're working With we are challenged to become better Than who we were yesterday and Our perspective is questioned and we're Forced to see things from a different Perspective to give an example I Remember working with a client recently And she said to me I'm finding it Challenging to get clients for my Business and I said to her how many Conversations have you had in the last

Few weeks and she said just a few and I Said that's where we're going to begin And my challenge to you is in the next 90 days I want you to get me 50 notes Get me 50 no's that was her challenge me As a coach I was holding her accountable For this challenge but what she didn't Know is that if she wants to do this Exercise properly she would never get to 50 news Because what happens is the more we put Ourselves out there the more chances for That yes and I remember she dropped me a WhatsApp uh shortly after and said Simon I don't think I'm gonna get to 50 notes And part of me was smiling in my head And I said tell me why and she said I've Just got my sixth yes And so that's part of what coaching is About it's to believe in the person Often before they can believe in Themselves and it is a gift to have Someone in your corner like that hmm How does one find a coach And like so like I'm for example know a bunch of people Who are like um you know maybe they've Got a job that they don't particularly Enjoy like it's fine and they're holding It out until the next promotion or Whatever and they know they want to Maybe start a side hustle start a Business on the side they don't really Know where to start and it's like

And they'll come to me for advice being Like where do I start and I'm like Ugh Um I mean have you read the four I work Week and then I fastly I mean I can Recommend a few books but I've I've Never once thought oh you should hire a Coach hmm um because like in my any even Though I've had coaches for the last two Years it that that's not a thing that Connects whereas if someone came into me And said how do I get better at tennis I Was like hire a tennis coach obviously That's just a no-brainer um yeah so Where does one get started if one might Might want to find a coach how does that Work sure well the great thing about Today's environment is that we can find A coach for a multitude of different Platforms so whether it is online Whether it is for a referral an Introduction or simply hopping onto Google now as with anything before you Invest in a coach it's important to get A feel for what that person is like and That's why you should seek out an Experience and that is why when I when I Work with younger coaches who are Looking to build their business I always Say The greatest gift you can give people Before they sign up to you as a client Is to give them an experience of what Coaching is about because coaching is

Very hard to explain to someone who has Never gone through the experience and so When you can invite somebody to have a Powerful conversation that's when they Walk out of the room and said I need coaching so is that like a sort Of free free trial kind of thing like Exactly exactly it's what you give them Experience of what coaching can have on Them and the actions that they take okay So it's like when I went to the gym and I was like I'm looking for a personal Trainer they were like oh we'll set you Up with a free session with one of our Guys and if you like it you can talk About it totally it's like a try on I Mean if you look at business in general Nearly every business starts with a Trial you know if you sign up to a Online platform chances that would be The 30-day free trial and then your Upsell to become a become a member with A subscription this is how it works if You like the experience what happens is You're more likely to want to invest in It but it's very difficult if you Haven't gone through that and when I First started building my coaching Practice I just went out to as many Events as I could to meet people and When I heard that they were going for a Challenge or there was an opportunity For me to help I simply said to them What are you doing next week would you

Be interested in having a powerful Conversation together a powerful Conversation and that's it I just Stopped it there and if it was a year s We would then have a meeting at my Office yeah and we would just dive deep To really understand what was going in Their mind so is it that like any kind Of challenge or is it like a domain Specific is it like oh I'm struggling to Generate leads for my business or my Relationship is falling apart or I'm Struggling to make Facebook ads like What what level of tactical versus Um abstract are we talking sure so for Me it would always begin at the broad Level uh Because unless you can address The broad issues there's no point Focusing on the Tactical okay because You can give someone all the Tactical Know-how but if they don't have the Baseline energy or the mindset or the Resources in place they're not going to Put into action you know we can just we Can go into Google we can go into YouTube there's all the Tactical stuff On there but the thing is very few People apply it now there has to be a Reason why we don't apply it and so for Me to tackle things at that level Because everything just flows from from That point Okay so let's say you were to come up to Me at one of these events and so I'm I'm

Not I'm not going to use myself right Now as an example because I think it's It's potentially unrelatable to both People but like let's say it's I've you've you've come to me at an Event and maybe I am a year into my Full-time job as a doctor and I'm not Really sure if it's for me and you and I Are talking and how how would that Conversation at the event go like sure So it depends chances are when we meet Guaranteed the first question you will Probably ask me because we don't know Each other would be Simon what do you do Yeah now How I respond to that is by giving what I call a trailer so when you go to the Cinema before you have the main feature Film you have a series of around five or Six trailers a trailer is very powerful Because most of us respond with a title So I'm an accountant I'm an engineer I'm An entrepreneur Unfortunately when we respond with a Title humans tend to box that into Certain judgments so if I say I'm an Accountant most people might think I'm Boring or how can I move on to the next Person why did I get stuck in this Conversation so I would first respond With a trailer something like everything I do Is to awaken people's imagination of What is truly possible so they can live

A better story Now what happens or a variant of that And now what happens is that chances are They get curious yeah like well tell me More okay and that is the purpose Because when I deliver a trailer okay They now want to watch the full film so In this case the film is my product or Service they get interested do you do You not feel like How did you get okay with just saying That completely sincerely like this is One of the things I like about you like Uh and in the book as well just a lot of The stuff like where the cynical glance Could be seen as a bit like woo Especially the whole energy thing and You're just so sincere about it like Were you always like this or did you Have to overcome the cringe response to Asking a question of what do you do Rather than saying I'm a coach with the Trailer sure I I think to be fair I've Never I've never seen as cringe purely Because I think that For me and something I share in the book There's always two sales to happen the Second sale is selling ourselves to Other people so whether that is getting Investment for your business selling an Idea to your colleagues or selling Yourself in your business the first sale Which few of us actually focus on is Selling ourselves to ourself and until

We can sell ourselves to ourselves of Course things are going to feel cringe Yeah but if actually you're coming from A place of authenticity and you believe That you have that value to off you have That value to offer yeah for me it Doesn't come across as cringe and so When I started to speak that it came From a place of belief uh you know I was Inspired actually to talk about trailers In such a way from from someone I saw in America on the speaking circuit and when He was asked what do you do the way he Responded came across so natural but it Was him No one else could say it in the way he Did it and I think that's where Authenticity comes from he said I have Been saving the world from boredom since Before you were born Now I'm interested tell me more in fact All he was was a public speaker but the Way he presented it got me interested Yeah Nice it's like a title and a thumbnail On a YouTube video almost where You kind of have to package it in a way That makes people want to click and want To find out more and some people might Be like clickbait but actually you want To toe the line between you want to be Sufficiently intriguing so as to Warrant Someone's attention definitely because If you just describe what the thing is

About No One's Gonna care and we have to We have to embrace that fact you know I Read in the in in the garden a few years Ago that the average attention span for A human was eight seconds yeah what they Did is they got people in the room they Gave them tasks and they would throw Distractions their way to see how long It would take before they would stop Doing the task and focus on the Distraction and they found that average To be eight seconds What was more interesting was the fact That the average attention span for Goldfish was nine seconds so that tells Us two things on the one hand is if our Attention span is that short how do we Manage our own attention and focus Secondly how do we get the attention From other people whether that is Customers audiences that we're looking To yeah speak to and that's where some Of these things come in handy the Psychology of an audience how do we Engage with people so they want to Listen so they want to ask questions They want to be curious okay so well I'm Sure we'll definitely come around to the How do we manage our own attention but Let's go back to this I'm where you and I are at the convention and I ask you Simon what do you do uh what What's your Trailer to that sure so one of the Versions I might say is everything I do

Is to awaken people's imagination of What is truly possible so they can live A better story now once we've gone past The introductions then I'd be like oh Okay Tell me more does that mean yeah and so What I do is I continue telling stories Because what I've understood is that We're humans which means we make Purchasing decisions not based on facts Or figures but based on emotion okay and So most of us when they then say tell me More how do you do what you do we jump Straight into Logistics we go well we Would meet twice a month we would look At deers we would meet here we can do it Virtual People don't care about that Yes at the end that's important but at This early stage I jump into more Stories so they might say how do you do What you do Simon tell me more I would Say something like well let me tell you About one of my clients Emma who came to Me about six months ago now when she First approached me this is where she Was at that moment of her life now just Yesterday she got an email from the United Nations inviting her to speak at A conference in Madrid something she Could never imagine that she could Achieve in her lifetime so what's going Through their mind now is wow Simon can You do to me what you did to Emma

So what they're doing is they're putting Themselves into that story Understanding that the role of a coach Is as a guide Is to unlock their own hero potential And they see that in the stories that we Share Okay So at this point I'm thinking I'm I'm putting myself in the shoes of Emma and I'm thinking huh I'm I feel Like I don't really know what to do oh Yeah I'd love to get invited by the United Nations or whatever that might Look like and then I'd probably ask okay So what does that what does that look Like how do you work with Emma Definitely so what I then do is when I Speak to the person in front of me I try And understand what is important to them Because again everyone has a different Version of success okay so they might Say well I want to do something that is More fulfilling I want to have more Freedom in my life and then I get even More curious because the whole point of This conversation is to unpackage what Is in their minds okay think of it like If you've ever seen a Sherlock Holmes TV Series or movie yeah before Sherlock Holmes dives into his mind to figure out The mystery or the answer to a crime Yeah he sits the person in an armchair Opposite him yep and he simply asked

Questions to unpackage what is in their Mind yeah so my next question may be Well what does freedom mean to you what Does freedom look like what does success Mean specifically yeah so once I get all Of this data this is just data a Gathering at this point then I can then lead them to that powerful Conversation by saying what would be Possible for you when you have that Freedom When you're able to choose how you spend Your time when you're doing something That fulfills you and brings you Joy Where you can wake up every Monday Morning excited by the week and not Dreading it what would be possible for You and then we move the conversation Into the land of possibility and that's What energizes them and then I simply Say would you like to explore more of This and have a conversation about how To begin making this work Shh Nice this is like I I'm I'm feeling Myself getting like I sort of having a Very cynical view of it at the start and Then being like Oh actually you know When you ask me what do I what do I Think of success like what does freedom Mean to me actually Some good questions uh and I think One of the things I find about about Coaching which is great is that a lot of

The The questions and stuff that a coach Would ask Are like a little bit weird in like a Normal social setting like you wouldn't Just over dinner ask someone so what's Your biggest challenge right now or Something like that and yet I know People who do that and I've started Doing that with people now and it's just Kind of interesting because it gets Straight to like an interesting Conversation Beyond it's so powerful Because I think that if we go Back decades before coaching was the Industry it is today this is what Friends did you know when you met up and You didn't have all of these Distractions of today screens technology Work and so on when you met up and had a Coffee with a friend you literally got Curious about people uh you know I did The exact same thing with a friend Recently and she she loved the Conversation we only met at a networking Event a couple of months ago and we met For coffee and she told me she was in The process of writing a book and so I Got curious I said how long have you Been writing the book for and she said It's been about five or six years and I'm just starting to get through the Process now And my natural next question was what

Has stopped you and now we were kind of Entering a coaching conversation here But it was very natural it wasn't weird Questions coming up it was just coming From place of curiosity and by the end Of that conversation she said wow You know I'm very inspired now and I Can't wait to show you the progress I Will be making in the next couple of Months and so she knew the answers it Was just about discovering the courage To take action and sometimes this is What coaching can do it can give people That space to reflect yeah to Connect the dots which we all have you Know we're all collecting dots all the Time through conversation through Watching YouTube videos listen to Podcasts learning from other people yeah However we don't give ourselves the Space to connect those dots and that's What's most important there's no point Collecting dots if you don't have the Space to connect them If you don't have this so okay so in my In my example of you know we've met at This this convention I I'm working Full-time as a doctor Simon in 60 hour Weeks like like what do you mean have to Have the space I don't have any any Space in my life well that would be the First place we would begin then is to Get some space back okay because if you Have zero space how can you focus on

What matters most yeah whatever we work On whatever you want to do in life you Simply don't have the time to do that And so you've got to understand that you Have to make some sacrifices for what You want otherwise the very thing that You want becomes what you sacrifice and So to remind people to reflect on that Vision they have for their life you know We can be energized in a moment I call This feeling positive or positively Charged but there's no point being Positively charged if there's no Magnetic charge of a vision that is Compelling and exciting nice once you've Got a vision that is compelling and Exciting you've got a magnetic charge in Place that's what pulls us forward okay Many of us simply don't know what it is We do want Yeah so this is a thing that I've been I Have been coming up against when when Making certain YouTube videos about this Where a lot of the comments are like Okay you're saying like you could make Money from your passions well I don't Know what my passion is like I don't I Don't actually know what I want like how Would someone listen to this or watching This start to approach that question of How do I figure out what I actually want Sure and It's a very it's a very important Question because a lot of people I speak

With say to me Simon I'm not taking Action or executing because I don't know What my purpose is and so how do I know I'm taking action on the right things That will lead me to where I want to be My response to that is none of us wake Up one morning and know exactly what we Want to do for the rest of our lives It would be great if that happens but It's only in the Hollywood film in Reality what happens is that we get Given Clues we get given insights we are Given experiences that nudges towards Where it is that we were meant to be now The best place to begin is instead of Asking yourself what is my passion and What is my purpose is to Simply ask Yourself what am I most curious about Right now oh right now what am I most Curious about now Here's why it's a powerful question Because asking yourself what my purpose And passion is puts you in the future But let's be honest none of us can Predict the future none of us know if The future we want is actually going to Manifest I mean how many people had the Coveted pandemic in their business plans No one So bringing it back to the present and Asking a softer question what am I most Curious about now grounds you in the Present and allows you to focus on Following those those truths those

Wisdoms that we have inside of us What do you mean by curious so I'll give An example yeah My journey into coaching wasn't because I woke up one morning said you know I Want to coach and speak for the rest of My life okay I I was in the financial Industry yeah I was disillusioned I was Feeling unfulfilled yeah and so my Curiosity at the time was What would life be like if I worked for Myself and I didn't work for other People okay now that Curiosity led me to Read business books uh to watch shows About entrepreneurship that led me into My first business venture which didn't Succeed but again I would never have Started it without that Curiosity that Led me to get involved in some Community Projects to be exposed to different People in different environments which Led me to my second business which Didn't work out but in that second Business led me to people that guided me To this coaching event that happened one Weekend that weekend became the Beginning of my journey but it was Curiosity that created those Stepping Stones now here's why it's important Whenever we begin A New Path we don't Get given the entire map up front That map Opens up as we take steps forwards And the more steps that we take the more

Of that map that is opened up to us it's Like putting together a jigsaw puzzle Yeah you know you can't see it straight Away but the more pieces you put Together the quicker that picture begins To form and that's what we've got to Trust trust in the process take one step Forward each day and imagine a year from Now where you could be 365 steps forward So We you mentioned that there's this sort Of magnetic field of vision So then by Vision do you just mean what Is the next step or like how how far are We planning here sure so There's an element of having a balancer You you have to have a vision to give You context for today otherwise you can Take any action because you don't know Where it's going to lead or where you Want to be yeah so the vision is Something that is compelling enough for You to want to take some action okay now When we look at the action piece it's Not about taking big steps it's then About taking small steps so thinking big And starting small that's the balance That we have to get yeah now the Thinking big piece is what activates our Our emotions yeah when we think about Something that we want to achieve in our Lifetime that is what creates that Emotional pull when we look at a present It's what is the one small step that is

In my control that I can take to date That's it just focus on today one small Step that will contribute to that Vision Starting to take shape and in tomorrow Ask yourself the same question what is One small step that I can take today That will move me forward so that's the Balance we have to have is do we have to Have Clarity of a vision that is Magnetic in nature but also to just take Small steps forward not to be Overwhelmed with how many steps there is To go yeah but just on the present Moment All right we're just going to take a Quick break from this episode to Introduce our sponsor which is very Excitingly heal now heal is great Because I've been a customer of huel for The last six years and also we've got an Interview with Julian Hearn who is the Founder of huel on this podcast so you Can check that out it'll be on the YouTube channel and on the Spotify page And that wasn't a fantastic masterclass In entrepreneurship but anyway we're Talking about heal because heel is a Fantastically complete meal so if you're Like me and you have a fairly busy life And you don't necessarily make the time To shop and cook and prep and wash up Like a healthy meal at home which is Obviously ideal then the nice thing About Hill is that it's a great

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Could be simple as starting to read Different material yeah it could be Going to different events now what Happens is that as you begin exposing Yourself to new environments that Energize you that Vision starts to Expand now you begin getting more Specific Freedom by doing what Freedom is a lifestyle where I can do X Now you start to fill in more of that Puzzle okay and then you take more steps Forward of course you start to fill in More division okay so the vision has to Begin with something and it can be even One word we've used Freedom here but Whatever word means something to you About what you want to work towards if You take small steps forward that's Where you get more clarity that Vision Starts to expand you start to get more Clear on what is in that vision for you Okay so I wonder if we can almost just like role Play this with my with my doctor Scenario so we're having a powerful Conversation you've asked me what I'm Curious about and I'm thinking You know what I want to say I I feel Like I'm so burnt out from this job I feel Like I used to be curious about things I Was super interested in like learning Learning to play the guitar and getting

Better music theory and I love the idea Of Um maybe starting a podcast one day Where I I interview people because I've Been listening to the Tim Ferrer show a Bit and I think it's kind of cool and I Listen to it on my commute but I just Like I feel like I don't really have the Time to to do any of it so I guess that's what I'm curious about Sort of a little bit of music a little Bit of like the podcast stuff sure but I Feel like I just don't really have the Space in my life too well my first Question to you would be what is Important about starting a podcast Hmm what is important about starting a Podcast I guess for me I like the idea of Learning from interesting people Um I feel like the reason I went into Medicine partly was this idea of Lifelong learning but now that I'm in it Like you know especially at the junior Level that I'm at a lot of it is like Following guidelines and it's it's it's Honestly not that intellectually Stimulating I know that eventually when I specialize in stuff it will be but Like at least right now I feel like I'm An admin monkey doing admin work And I feel like I'm not really learning Anything beyond beyond the first few Weeks so I just I I think that's a

Really cool way and when you have a Podcast like I know that lets you just Meet people because then you can say do You want to be on my podcast rather than Hmm uh just do you want to have a chat And so that's why I I've kind of had Vaguely had this idea in the back of my Mind but I'm I I'm not really sure if They'll go anywhere um And What would life be like If You could focus and prioritize lifelong Learning If I could focus and prioritize lifelong Learning I feel like life would be a lot better I Feel like if I again if I had if I had The time for it in my in in my life I I Feel like every week every month I'd be You know because I I like I like to read A bit when I when I have the time and There's always new things that I want to Want to learn more about and that gives Me a lot of fulfillment how important is It for you to start making steps towards Making that a reality on a scale of one To ten oh Question Um Honestly right now is probably like a Two because I just I can't see anyway Like I know that for the next two years I've got to grind out this foundation Training and maybe at that point then

I'll have time in my life to if I take a Break but then I know if I take a break Then I'm not gonna have a salary coming In and so I I keep on coming up against That barrier of I I know I'm in this Career path I know I need the money to Pay rent but like I just don't feel like I feel like once I have the time then of Course I can do all the lifelong Learning hmm How long have you been saying that to Yourself when I have the time Honestly since for the last like eight Years ever since I got into med school I Was like When I get out then I'll have time to do This and now that I'm working and think When I when I take my break then I'll Have time to do this so I've been Telling myself that for for like eight Years at this point eight years I'm Curious if you were to have taken Some small steps eight years ago where Do you think it could be now oh Yeah you got me um probably Living a life that I'm I feel more Infused by I guess Um although even then it's it's Hard to say because like this this Career path that I'm in feels like it's You know I'm on this I'm on this Conveyor belt and I have to like but I Guess I guess that's what I've been Telling myself that I have to keep on

Taking that next step within medicine Itself which feels like it doesn't Really leave enough time for for the Things that I want to do I'm curious you Said you've been telling yourself is That really you telling yourself Hmm Is it really me telling myself I I think it's Always that someone else telling you That inside As in is it because that's been Imprinted into you by an outside Influence Is that really what it is you want to do Oh yeah That's a good point I think like ever Since I even entertained the thought of Going to medical school everyone around Me has been telling me how difficult It's going to be and how tough it is and You know obviously during school I had To grind super hard to get all these Like grades and stuff and when I was at University in medical school suddenly From day one it was like okay well You've got to continue grinding because It's specialty applications and Foundation applications and it's like at Every stage I've been so focused on how Do I take that next box That to me it's always felt like oh of Course I don't have time in my life I'm A medical student now I I have to be

Grinding all the time to to pass my Exams and stuff Here's a thought for you And I think it's something You know deep down It's not a question of time It's a question of whether it is Important to you you and I know that if Something is really important to you you Will make time for it If I was to recommend your Netflix show That everyone is watching at the moment That is getting all the attention in the Press I have no doubt you will find time To watch it So now I feel deep down you know Yourself it's not question of time it's The question of importance how important Is it for you to do something that is More fulfilling to live life for you and Not for others Damn I've never thought of that Um Now that you mention it it's yeah it's Pretty important it's pretty it's pretty Important I would I would love that for That to be my life so my challenge to You And I don't know where this is going to Go after this but let's say we were to Touch base in a week from now what would Be one thing that you would commit to Doing between now and next week However small To start making what you've shared with

Me a reality Hmm Okay I guess I could Like for example I like this idea of Starting a podcast I think it would be It would be cool so I guess I could Watch a YouTube video about how to start A podcast and Um Start making a plan of what that could Look like I'm noticing the word could a lot I'm going to rephrase the question again What will you do between now and next Week I will watch a YouTube video about how To start a podcast and I will make a Plan for what my podcast is going to Look like great let's get specific get Your calendar out when exactly will you Be blocking out time to watch that YouTube video Okay so I've got a shift tomorrow and The day after but oh I've only got a Half day and you know on Sunday so Sunday Finish work at 1pm get home by 2 I think Lunch two to three okay three to four P.m I will make time to watch that that YouTube video fantastic and in the Second part to what you shared when will You make plans To move forward so you said watch

YouTube video and make some plans to Make that a reality when would be a good Time to make some plans for you good Question Um so I'm actually free that rest of the Afternoon so three to four pm I'll watch That YouTube video and find a bunch of Videos to figure out what the next steps Are and then four to five pm I'll Commit to making to making a plan of What my podcast is going to look like Amazing you know what I can't wait to Speak to you again next week and hear How you've got on with watching those YouTube videos and to see what you've Put together in that plan Nice that's so good how how did you Learn how to do that I would love to be Able to do that the thing is a secret if You've noticed a lot of coaches when They first start yeah is we're seeking Bank of questions what are the questions I should ask which is the right question To ask in the right moment the truth is The best question comes in the moment The best question can only present Itself when we listen to what the other Person is saying because Once we begin stepping into that Person's world so what I was doing if You were noticing I was Data Gathering Yeah and as I was Data Gathering it Allowed me to step into your world a bit More to see the world that you were

Living in and so it helped me to Understand where to push where to Challenge but also where to question and That can only be built through practice As with any skill to master something We've got to practice it Nice okay so coming back to your um so You're working in finance and you were Kind of helping people get into jobs in The city that's fairly analogous to what I was doing in medicine and helping People get into med school and that was For me how I realized oh I actually Really enjoy teaching teaching is kind Of fun it's this cool thing to do Um oh and so you said that you did this Two-day coaching coaching thing like What what was that like sure so it was Won by a company called a coaching Academy I went in there just like Yourself earlier I was a bit skeptical I Went in there thinking what am I going To really learn in two days the Saving Grace was the fact that it was free and The only thing that it would cost me was My time by the end of that weekend I Remember coming home to to my wife and I Said to her I want to sign up to this Course it's so exciting and I can't wait To learn more about how to apply these Coaching skills into the lives of other People And two years later I finished I was Balancing this alongside a nine to five

I finished with with two qualifications And then I started to apply that in the Conversations that I had with people and Before long I started to build my Coaching practice and then from there Things started to happen organically I Went from Dad into speaking being Invited onto Sky News and the BBC to Talk about my work and then more Recently signing a book they were Penguin to write not only about my Journey but what I've learned through The work that I've done with clients and Also speaking to audiences from Corporate to the public One criticism that some people have of The coaching industry is that it's Unregulated and anyone can just call Themselves a coach and you see these 18 Year old influencers who suddenly become Life coaches like what's what's going on In that side of the industry and I yeah I guess you're sort of in it so you can Sure yeah I think this is why it goes back to Getting an experience with a coach first Before you agree to do anything because As you said it's one of those Industries Where anybody can be a coach I mean you Can set up your social media account in A couple of hours you can call yourself A coach and you can start marketing what You do But for me when I'm looking for a coach

Or Mentor I want to see somebody's track Record I also want to have an experience With someone so I know what they're Capable of A lot of people can read books and think They're a great coach straight away Without any practice or experience it's Not just in the coaching world it's in a Lot of different businesses we can start Something and People find it very difficult to tell The difference because we have an Abundant of services in in in the board That we're in at the moment and so For me It's important to be careful about who You trust in the online world But also what we want to do is to look At how they're focusing on themselves as Well because as a coach we can only lead And take people as far as we have gone Ourselves and if we're not improving if We're not putting ourselves out there if We don't even have a coach or Mentor Ourselves how can we help those that we Want to help and so again research is is Such a critical component of this but It's a valid question Ali because I Often get asked How important qualifications are as part Of becoming a coach because in a world In which as you said anybody can become A coach how important of a role do Qualifications play I got my

Qualifications after starting for a Couple of years but it's a tricky one And how I tend to respond to this is That what is more important is the Results that somebody has got because You might have somebody who has all the Qualifications under the sun They're great at what they do But They don't have the experience they Haven't built a successful business Or you can have somebody with little to No qualifications yet they have Incredible results and work with some Inspiring Titans and have been featured In multiple media Outlets I mean who are You going to be more inclined to work With More likely the latter and and so it's Important to focus on the results that You can get and over time that speaks For itself Okay So would love to talk more about the Book in a sec but I guess one kind of Final strand I wanted to go down was [Music] Um Let's say someone's listening to this And thinking oh quite fancy myself Becoming a coach Um And maybe they're I don't know working a Normal job whether they're a student or

Something Um actually yeah let's say they're Working a normal job and they don't Particularly enjoy the job and they're Like you know this coaching thing seems Pretty good but realistically they're Looking at it as like oh you're saying I Can make money by just asking people's Questions something that's something That sounds fun Um let's say I'm in that position where I've got my day job and I like the idea Of being a coach on the side to make a Bit of money and potentially quit my job One day what would be the next action Steps and would you recommend this as a Path to go down Well with regards to the question of What I recommend it as a path to go down For me the first place is to really Understand why is coaching important to Them because I don't want them to be Doing it just because they saw someone Make a lot of money from it or they saw It as a glamorous path because as Glamorous as some paths can be there is Always the challenges the setbacks and The failures that you are going to Experience and so if you're not really Focused on wanting to make something out Of that path you're not going to survive The setbacks and the challenges you you Will naturally face on the journey and So for me the first places to understand

How important is it for you to become a Coach what is this purpose in embarking On this journey now if money comes into It I would then throw the question back To them and said let's say you've made All the money you've ever wanted so Let's say money's not an issue now what Would you do with that money because It's to help them understand that money Is not an end goal it's a means goal It's it's fuel it's like filling up your Car you know money's like the petrol you Put into your car you've got to know Where you're driving your car to in Order to know how much petrol to put Into it now in order to know how much Money you want to have then you've got To understand what are you going to use That money for Otherwise you fall into the Trap of Lottery winners who when they win the Jackpot they end up becoming bankrupt or In a worse position than they were Before they won the jackpot because they Simply didn't have a purpose for the Money okay and if you don't have a Purpose for money what happens is you End up just spending it Okay so in my in my case let's say I This doctor example I've listened to This podcast I'm thinking oh yes I want To be a coach and I'm thinking I do like Teaching you know I talk people I taught Students in medical school and that was

Quite fun and part of being a doctor is About being a teacher you know classic Interview answer Um and so I like the idea of teaching And I like the idea of being able to Help people through asking them Questions and I thought the questions You asked me to get me started on my Podcast for particularly like well that Was nice that's why I feel like I made Progress there But realistically I'm also thinking Hmm My salary is about 33k right now working 60 hours a week could I make an extra One or two thousand pounds a month Because if I do that I can potentially Save up for a deposit on a house and Then I'll just feel less of a money and Security so I'd be combining this Vague interest that I haven't like oh You know I think I think I enjoy Teaching I want to make money I thought This coach stuff sounds pretty Interesting and in my mind I'm also Thinking Realistically that Are you saying that I just need a few Clients who'll pay me some money I mean Like starting a podcast feels really Hard like I'm you know there's no way It's gonna get big like you know it's Like trying to be a musician or Something it's basically never gonna Work but

Could I possibly make one or two Thousand pounds a month by being a coach So those would be the motivations Floating around for me the first two Errors that I will explore my questions Would be one space and second Focus so What I mean by space is well let's look At your week how much space in your diet Would you currently have and how much Would you need to actually give this Some proper dedication So I would look at your week and say Okay what can you eliminate or what can You reduce to give yourself some more Oxygen and space to explore this Interest of yours now once we've got That in place the next part is to Actually get some focus and uh I think It was Cal Newport the first talked About Focus being today's IQ he said That in the past we would measure People's IQ by how much they knew Nowadays when you and I can go into Google we can ask Amazon Alexa and get An answer within seconds it's not about How much you know now it's about your Ability to focus and so the next Question I would ask is how will you Know that with the space you have over The next seven days it will have been Active week And so it's beginning with the end in Mind so now what we're doing is we're Bringing a bit of focus into the space

That we've created And then now once we've got this put Together we now have some path that We're working towards because at a high Level if we want to design our life if We want to design something that is Fulfilling it begins with designing our Dates if we can't design our days how Can we expect to design a life Okay So Coming coming back to the question of Would you recommend the career path it Sounds like yeah if you want to make Money and you enjoy teaching and you Think you'd use the money to do Something good then definitely it would Be a reasonable I'm all further because As long as It's a path that is fulfilling for you That you are interested in that you're Curious about that plays to your Strengths why not but also not to be Attached to the outcome of it you know I Went to Kyoto in Japan and there was a beautiful English statement at one of the temples And it read be attached to no outcome And open to everything Now I've tried my best to embody that Principle throughout my entrepreneurial Journey because I think so many of us Get caught up in outcomes so we'll try Something and if it doesn't work out we

Tend to stop and give up but if we can Detach ourselves from outcomes then what It allows us to do is simply just Experiment and as a second part of the Sentence says be open to everything Very often we're like when I get this When I get more time when this happens When I get that qualification then I'll Start when everything is ready but the Fact is will never be 100 ready and if We're always measuring our success by Outcomes only then it's not going to be A very enjoyable Journey but actually if We can focus on who we are becoming How we are going for our own personal Metamorphosis in the journey that to me Is the greatest reward it's not what you Get but it's who you become in the Process Okay nice So as I'm going through this path of Learning to become a coach because maybe The destination I have in mind is like I'll make an extra couple Grandy a month Um But it sounds like you're saying I Should also Figure out a way to I guess enjoy the Process and become The sort of person I want to become Through the Journey rather than being Fixated on like I need to make 2K month Extra definitely because I think if you Focus on enjoying the process if you

Start to put healthy discipline systems In place what happens is that you're Setting yourself up to achieve multiple Outcomes not just one outcome but you Open yourself up to achieve outcomes That you may not even see possible right Now I mean if you speak to anyone who's Committed to a journey and I use the Word committed purposefully anyone who's Committed to a journey and played full Out And has been open to everything they've Often got more than they bargained for They may have fought at the beginning It'll be great if I get X and then once They're committed to the journey they Suddenly got more than just X so now X Becomes small compares to everything Else they're achieving and so that's why It's important to actually enjoy the Process because when we do that the Rewards will eventually come I love it yeah like this is something That I say a lot in our in our YouTuber Academy on in our course where There is one view that like oh you gotta Grind Out YouTube for the next two years And then only then will you have success And that is true but like my model has Always been that find a way to enjoy the Journey because like you you're so Unlikely to get a measurable successful Outcome in a small amount of time and if

You're a wedded to that then you know Those are the sorts of people that burn Out within like a couple of weeks a Month as realize oh this YouTube thing Is hard and it's not getting any results But I think what I did well in the early Days was not be attached to an outcome Yeah just focus on the process focus on The things that I can control one or two Videos a week and focus on making it fun For myself and have a little bit of Improvement because which was inherently Enjoyable and energizing and then it Almost didn't matter what the outcome Was or what the numbers were because I Knew that I was my my life was being Enriched by the journey yeah I I love That earlier and I can I can personally Resonate with that because if I look Back at a progress I've made I never Plan to be a speaker I never planned to Write a book but it just shows that you Get more than you bargain for when you Commit to the journey so when I left Employment it was just simple build a Healthy five in coaching practice that Was all I was focused on doing but as I Started to do that and I was playing With my systems I was building a Learning mindset I was hiring mentors And coaches before long people said Simon you should speak at this event and Then oh Simon can we interview for this Media Outlet Simon have you thought

About writing a book and so what happens Is that when you show up at a certain Vibrational frequency what happens is You begin to attract things into your Life that feel dream like sometimes and And that means why the journey is so Enjoyable why the journey has to be fun Because what happens is that's where the Magic is What do you mean by show up at a certain Vibrational frequency sure so what I Mean by that is that when you show up in The world so whether it's in a Conversation uh whether it's at the Event uh whether it's how you deliver Your business when you vibrate at a Certain way now what I mean by this is That you show up with a certain energy Yeah and the best way to describe this Is that if you were going to an event to Hear someone speak or to network with People You might say to your friends I really Liked this person I can't explain why But there's something about that person I really like that's what we're talking About when we say energy it's a language That has no words but you and I can feed It So when you go to a networking event and You're deciding who do I speak to who do I introduce myself to if two people come Up to you you're naturally drawn to one Over the other yeah now you can't

Explain it you might just say there's Just something about him or her and That's what I'm talking about about Vibration frequency and energy when we Show up in a certain way what happens is That we draw people into our field and They want to spend time with us they Want to help us they want to see us get To that next level Hmm how does how does one cultivate One's own sense of vibrational frequency Slash energy slash Vibes like yeah sure And this is where we go into how I Describe energy uh so energy in one Sense is this life force that we all Possess so in the Maori culture they Call it Mana in my Chinese culture we Call it Chi if you are founded the Star Wars film franchise you probably refer To it as the force so on the one hand it Says life force that we all have but we Don't access enough now in order to Really Elevate the energetic quality of Our field it requires us to look at four Dimensions physical mental emotional and Spiritual We as a society tend to only focus on The physical get more sleep get more Rest move your body feed yourself right Yeah but we tend to neglect the other Three often because they're more Invisible the mental emotional spiritual But once we start addressing those other Three dimensions that's how we begin to

Show up with more energy I mean just Imagine this for a moment With regards to spiritual energy You are doing something that is aligned To who you are that allows you to Express your strengths and you feel that You're in flow most of the time that's What we call high and spiritual energy Low in spiritual energy is where the Work that you're doing is not aligned to The work that you want to do and that's Where we have some tension that exists Inside of us and some of us may may Relate to this you know you go into work On a Monday morning there's this tension Because you're doing work where you feel You're trapped or you're not able to Express some of those skills that are Still dormant inside of you for so long Emotional energy is how you respond to What happens in the external world but Also how you relate to yourself and Others now when we can understand the Way we relate to ourselves and others And we can respond in a healthy way That's where we begin bending and Shaping our reality Into one that is working for us and not Against us you know in the book earlier I introduced this word to the audience I Say that we all know about the word Paranoia that is the feeling that Somebody's out to sabotage me I am not Getting that promotion because

Somebody's trying to put me down or Spread gossip why is it always me that I Fail and that I I can't get the success That other people are getting the word I Introduce people to is pronoia pronoia Is this belief that the universe is Conspiring in your favor that life is Working for you and not against you and The question I give to my audience is Imagine Where life could be if you embraced Paranoia Where every setback can challenge was Meant to exist to give you a lesson to Serve you in some way so this is all About emotional energy mental energy is Then our ability to focus and access our Creativity which we all have we're born Innately creative so once we have the Ability to focus on what is most Important and access our creativity we Operate at a far higher energetic level So once we begin focusing on these Dimensions that's what I mean by showing Up with more energy hmm And so the kind of vibe that someone Would have if they have their physical Mental emotional and spiritual energy Like aligned during whatever Will naturally create some sort of X Factor that makes you feel drawn to them As a person definitely this person seems Cool definitely I mean even if if we and If we look at this quote and it just

Popped into my head early by Maya Angelou she said When people hear you they may forget who You are they may forget what you say but They will never forget how you made them Feel and that is talking to energy Because when we walk out of a room and We've heard someone connect with us at An emotional level we never forget that Experience So how does the book come into this like What is what is the book about So the book Taps into what I shared About energy within those four Dimensions it's about how we can Transform the way we live and work by Transforming Our relationship with Energy and so it's also a journey of of My own you know from the world of Finance to what I do today but also what I've learned from working with my Clients observing success stories around Me and the lesson that I've acquired Along the way And It's a it's a stark reminder to people Reading it that when we Embrace that Eternal student mindset we begin to open Our field to over a billion teachers Around the world that every person has a Story to share and lessons to tell and If we're humble enough to operate from That perspective Life can be so enjoyable I mean we're

Learning machines we we fully Embrace That white bot mentality and we become Aware that there is so much that is Possible Okay So let's Let's take things back to my genie dog For example and I've got my thing in the Calendar to do the podcast or maybe and Maybe I'm sort of thinking oh this coach Thing sounds kind of cool Um As you describe the energy thing I'm Thinking yeah I feel like I'm probably low on spiritual energy Because the thing that I'm doing in my Day in my day job feels like this this Is tension between what I think I want And what I think my strengths are I.E learning and teaching and stuff and Like what I'm actually doing are you Being an admin monkey broadly I think physical health-wise Probably don't get enough sleep Um probably you know because I take away On the way home from work from the McDonald's drive-through uh I don't take My health very seriously that's actually What I do Um mentally yeah I think I think I can Focus reasonably well and emotional uh I think I respond to people reasonably Well but I guess I I see I can see a big Gap in physical and spiritual is is that

How yeah so that would be a good place To start because awareness is the most Important place to start I often say That we we can't have self-development Without self-awareness because you can't Change what you're not aware of and so Once we've got an idea within those four Dimensions well what is giving me energy What is draining me of energy then the Next thing I would say is then given What you shared with me that you would Like to do or what could be improved if You were to pick just one of the things That you shared with me which one of Those things that if you were to give Attention to it would have the greatest Impact on all the other areas for you I mean I think if I could magically make My job feel more in alignment with Myself then that would have a big Knock-on effect but I feel like I'm kind Of stuck in this job for the next at Least for the next two years so that Almost seems like a non-starter unless I'm unless there's something I can do to Change that So what is in your control that you can Do Hmm I mean I can definitely stop eating take Away from the McDonald's drive through Every day I can definitely take my sleep A bit more seriously uh go to bed Because I know I have to wake up early

To get to work at like 6 a.m but that Means I could it is in my control to Sleep at 10 and get eight hours of sleep Rather than to take my phone into bed With me and like scroll Twitter for an Hour and then feel like bleary eyed the Next morning yeah that's definitely in My control hmm so when will you begin Sleeping at that time so you can wake up Less bleary-eyed and not scrolling on Your phones and waking up with low Energy you know what tonight I'm gonna Do it I'm gonna sleep at 10 because I Know I have to wake up at six tomorrow Fantastic well let's touch base some More and I look forward to hearing how Much energy you have when you wake up With a full night's sleep Nice It'll it'll it'll come together Um yeah I think I think this is great Like I find that even with So much of coaching is Just like asking asking the questions And just providing a little bit of a Prod of accountability yeah And people kind of know what the answer Is like we all do yeah and and the thing Is we know what the answers are deep Inside of us but For whatever reason and it's different For each of us we're afraid to take the Steps forward

And sometimes it's just putting things In A New Perspective shifting our mind In a certain way to get those aha Moments that will be the prodders you Say for us to take action okay you know Talking with skepticism I remember I was Invited to a company over in Canary Wharf to to do a talk and At the end of the event one of these Managers come comes up to me and you Know these managers didn't have to come They just kind of went along because it Was hosted in the building and he said To me Simon what you said makes a lot of Sense I can hear what you're saying Um but why is it important why should I Listen to what you shared uh what is Incentive for me to to apply this to my Daily life And the question I asked him Forced him to pause and to reflect and That's one of the purpose behind good Questions I simply said to him When was the last time you felt truly Happy And he had to pause Because it's a sort of question we don't Really reflect on often And it paused He paused because he had to think about That question a lot which told me a lot Of things first thing it told me is that Maybe he wasn't happy right now the fact That he had to go and think about it and

He said You know what Simon it's interesting That question I'm just realizing as you ask me that Question some of the cars I've bought Some of the Investments I've made They've been great for a while But I don't think they really make me Happy And the question is quite challenging Because I think it's been a long while since I Have felt truly happy And literally the question I asked next Is it was as simple as what does that Tell you And that's because he already knows what It is telling him sometimes we just have To verbalize it in order to bring to our Awareness of where we are and where we Actually want to be And so asking those questions at the Moment really helped to shift His mind from one that was skeptical to One that was interested To what could be This episode is very kindly brought to You by wework now this is particularly Exciting for me because I have been able Paying customer of wework for the last Two years now I discovered it during you Know when the pandemic was in the on the Verge of being lifted and I spent like The whole year just sort of sitting in

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People I made a few friends through Meeting them at wework and it's just Really nice being in an environment Almost like a library but kind of nicer Because there's like a little bit of Soft music in the background and there's Other kind of startup Bros and creators And stuff in in there as well and it's Just my absolute favorite co-working Space of all time it's super easy to Book a desk or book a conference room Using the app and it's a great place to Meet up with team members if you're Going to collaborate and you'll live in Different places they've got unlimited Tea and coffee and herbal teas and Drinks on tap and they've also got Various kind of after work events that Happen like happy hours and yoga and a Few other exercise type things and you Can also take in guests so often when Guests will come over to visit I'll say Hey let's pop into wework and we'll just Work from there for the whole day and Then we'll go out for dinner sometime in The evening anyway if you're looking for A co-working space for you or your team Then I'd 100 recommend we work like I Said I've been a pain customer for Theirs for the last two years which is Why it's particularly exciting that They're now sponsoring this episode and If you want to get 50 off your first Booking then do head over to

Forward slash Ali and you can use the Coupon code Ali at checkout Ali to get 50 of your first booking so thank you so Much wework for sponsoring this episode Let's take another couple of examples I'm just like this is this is great I Just love how you're responding to all Of like I'm I'm I'm trying I'm trying to Be a bit of a Dicker like to be like oh Come on I'm coaching and then you're Let's just ask and I'm like oh you're Right that's a good question and then I'm really it's like and even even Though like I'm sort of in a way role Playing a character where there's not a Thing I'm I'm sort of at the same time Feeling like oh that's a really Good question I shouldn't think about That in my own life as well Um So one thing that And now I'm kind of speaking completely Personally one thing that I struggle With is taking my physical health more Seriously in my mind I have this idea of Like oh it'd be cool to be a bit more Ripped it'd be cool to get maybe six Pack abs but like uh I I end up eating Takeaway quite a lot and I think my health at the moment is like Fine like it could be better but it's Like Shrine and I'm not sure how much I Care about the six-pack abs versus but Like I know that like I should care

About my physical health and you how how Should how would yeah if if yeah well First of all based on what you showed Earlier if it's only for the six pack Abs and yeah the muscle look uh that's Not going to be sufficient uh you and I Probably know that's not going to be Sufficient enough motivation uh to keep You consistent because everybody that Starts their New Year's resolution with I want to get fitter I want to lose Weight I'm going to get six pack abs you Know what happens you know they sign up To the gym three four months later They're using it far less than they ever Did and by the time we get to September October they may be using it once once a Week twice a week if that and and so we Stop being consistent because What we know at a high level is that There's no such thing as overnight Success there's only over time success And so in order to play the long game And be consistent in having that healthy Habit we've got to have a purpose for it And and this is tied in with the concept Of living with intention what is your Purpose to get fit Why is it important to have a healthy Lifestyle now until you have a reason to Have a healthy lifestyle You're not gonna maintain that Consistency so for me at the beginning Just to give you some background on how

I've maintained my healthy lifestyle at The beginning it was simply because I Knew I was going to get married in in About 10 months and I had just ordered a Tailor-made suit and I I could lose Weight but I couldn't gain weight Otherwise I would have to buy another Suit and so that was my initial purpose Was that if I embrace a healthy Lifestyle I could fit in the suit and I Wouldn't have to worry about getting Another one now once I started to get Into the routine after the wedding it Just became part of my lifestyle and Then another motivation kicked in later When I became a parent is that I then wanted to live a long life so I Could see my child grow up go to school Go to college experience life go through Their own personal development and in Order to do that suddenly living a Healthy life became a core to living a Long life And also because bringing to the mix the Fact that I I lost my mom when I was 17. That showed me how fragile life was and I didn't want something that was in my Control I.E physical health to be a Factor why I could not live a long life If it's in my control I wanted to make Sure that I could address it to the best Of my ability and now that became a Purpose for living a healthy lifestyle So that I could live a long life with my

Wife and I could be there for my Children when they grow up that became Something powerful enough to make going To the gym going running outside going Swimming tiny in comparison to the Rewards that I would get hmm so is it About like Essentially maxing out our motivation to Want to do the thing it's it's to have a Reason to do it okay if you don't have a Sufficient reason to do something you're Not going to keep it up and and you have To have a reason to do something The more Important the reason and the more Personal the reason the more you're Going to keep at it Um So my thing of like it'll be cool to get Six-pack abs because like maybe I can Like I don't know become a gym shark Athlete I I I I don't actually care About that it's not a thing that Resonates like that's emotionally moved It's just and it would be kind of cool And then I can post a topless pick on it Exactly and I think you've kind of Answered your question Ali you said it's Not something you care about yeah and so My challenge to you would be to find Something you care about in which that Plays a role in whatever you care about Okay So let's say on the physical health

Front like I love playing squash tennis Badminton and I don't do a lot of that Right now because in my mind I'm sort of Thinking but I wanna I wanna get big For some reason and I'm thinking like Well uh squash badminton I mean like I Should probably just do weights and Stuff Um but actually the thing I enjoy is Playing squash with friends and doing Like Potentially even hosting like a five or Seven football night with some friends Or like doing like a little like weekly Badminton get together and that would be Super fun because it's a sport that I Enjoy and it's socializing whereas right Now it's like you know I have our Session with my personal trainer this Evening and I'm not looking forward to It I know it's gonna be a bit Grim yeah I'm gonna Say something it's interesting because What you shared I'm going to reflect Back to you you said that It'll be more fun if I did the squash And organize the football it's very Social and I noticed you got quite Excited sharing that but then when it Came to the personal trainer your tone Dropped and he said Ah that's Graham I'm Not really looking forward to it yeah And you and I know we spoke about this Before that in order to actually be

Disciplined with a process it's got to Be fun and enjoyable and so it sounds Like you're going against what is Actually fun and enjoyable for you yeah To do something Which maybe you don't care so much about Hmm Which is the getting big Jim shark Athlete the show the body off yeah but Actually what brings you more fun and Enjoyment is doing the squash and Spending time with friends playing Fighter side football whatever is that That you were mentioning just now That's telling isn't hmm Yeah Why am I holding on to this six pack Weird and the thing is is there's never One route to get to A goal that is common amongst amongst Many of us uh that there's a case study I share in the book about an athlete Called Sophie Radcliffe she hated the Gym she never considered herself a Natural athlete and so instead what she Did is she went Outdoors she signed Herself up to challenges such as Triathlons cycling challenges climbing Mountains and and these sort of things And she found so much joy and Fulfillment from there that actually her Brand is just catapulted to the next Level and she's been partnering with the Likes of U.S staff and BBC and all these

Other brands who have followed her in Her travels to as far as Malaysia to Europe to America to cycling challenges She has taken on but all of these things Are Outdoors that outside of the gym but They make her feel alive and it's what She finds fun doing nice We talked a little bit earlier about You know if you want to stay disciplined With something it's important to find a Way to make it enjoyable to enjoy the Process Um I very much Vibe with that but it Strikes me that it's it's quite a Privileged position to to be in because A lot of people have to do things that They don't necessarily find fun or Particularly want to do any student that Is like I want I know I want to be a Doctor but to get there I know I have to Grind out these random subjects I Actually don't care about because I know It's a prerequisite or someone who's Working a job that might not necessarily Enjoy because they have to pay the bills How do we approach that how would you How would you be approaching that kind Of thing sure well first of all I think There's there's two camps to what you Shared on the one hand it's what is that Thing you want actually what you want Because if the steps required to get There isn't something that excites you

Is that really what you want then Because whenever you embark on a path You are going to have to go things that You don't you have to go through doing Things you don't want to do The second Camp is you might still like The destination but you might not like That process and you want to get Creative so I think there's two camps The first question is is there actually Something you want to do if you don't Like the journey the second is if you do Really like the outcome how can you Change the journey okay and now that's Where we can get a bit creative if you Look up and I'm going to use a cooking World as an example because there are Some great case studies there if you Look at Heston Blumenthal he has become One of the most well-known chefs in the World he's become a TV personality but Yet The guy has received no formal training He learned by himself how to cook and he Ended up coming up with his own style of Cooking and that's what he became known For so he bypassed what many would have Had to take years to qualify in order to Be to have become the chef that they Want to be but Hassan took a very Different approach if we look at another Case study in the book that I wrote here Kylie flavelle is a woman who I referred To in this case study she moved from

Australia to Italy And she couldn't afford to pay a video Production company to put together his YouTube videos she wanted to create her Own travel show where she would travel The world and interview local Communities so she hopped onto YouTube And she learned everything there was to Know about editing distribution Production recording directing and Producing and she became a one-woman Media company and has grown her YouTube Channel massively since she first Started and has partnered with some of The world's most well-known brands so She bypass the fact again she had to go To a school or to learn from people how To film and to get qualifications so I Think if it's something you really want To do is If you don't like the process to get There How can you be a bit more creative in Arriving at the same destination Because as I mentioned earlier there's Never just one way We are Quickly conditioned to think there is Only one way just as I was when I grew Up I had to go to a good school get top Grades go to a good University in order To get a good job But actually today you can still get a Good job by not going through the same

Process so how do you think a little Different in achieving the same aims Okay cool so let's say I am Yeah thinking cool A I want to get a coach myself and That's you know I'll do some Googling I'll find someone maybe see if I've got Any one of my network has some Recommendations And I'm also thinking I like this idea Of becoming a coach like what is the Playbook for becoming a coach like what What Like let's say a friend of yours would Be like right someone I want to become a Coach uh what are the next steps that You should take sure well I can only reference my own experience Uh the first I would always say is to Look at learning the skill of coaching Yeah because If you just jump straight into it you Will quickly be found out that you don't Have the relevant experience or Qualifications I would first say learn About the skill of coaching either by Signing up to One of these courses where you can learn About the skill signing up for Qualification or shadowing and learning From people who have done it for years That would be my first step second As with anything you know if you want to Become a writer you write if you want to

Speak you speak if you want to coach Coach so get out there and start Coaching people for free at the Beginning start building up that Experience because what happens when you Start coaching people is that gives you Exposure yeah to different people from Different backgrounds different life Situations different goals different Aims so what happens is the more people You coach through the way that you speak For the way that you have these Conversations The more knowledge and wisdom you have When it comes to coaching people that Eventually pay you hmm And so how would you go about finding These three clients would you say to Your friends hey I'm going to be a code Life coach do you want to sign up or Definitely I would say as with any Business when you first start tap your Network tap your network at the Beginning when I first started I just Reached out to a few trusted friends and Said I am looking to start my coaching Business soon and in order to build that Experience I'm looking for free people Who would like to be coached by me for The next six months at zero cost in Exchange for a testimonial and feedback That's exactly how I started now people Love things for free especially when They can get to experience something

They've not had been exposed to before That's exactly how I started and If it didn't go well nothing to lose They haven't paid me this is not public This is a very private conversation if It did go well chances that they would Refer me to their Network they would Write a glowing testimonial and so those Things will lead to my next clients and My next clients Nice And I guess so the the other day I'm I'm I met someone who recognized me in the Station and you know she said that yeah I should be a bit in medicine for 14 Years and was leaving to become a coach And was doing a coaching qualification And we grabbed breakfast a couple days Later and Um she was doing a lot of like I had had Was doing a qualification and therefore Through that found a bunch of free People that that she was coaching and I Was sort of challenging her and why she Wasn't charging for the thing just yet She said oh yeah I need to wait another Six months until my qualification Finishes I was like okay cool what then And then she was like oh well you know Then I need to build my build my brands On my website like you know organic Marketing content marketing I was like I mean what's stopping you From trying to make the sale from

Charging charging the money and then There was a lot of like emotional Barriers around like the fear of Charging money for a thing Um how did you get a like how or what Was your experience of dealing with like Because anytime someone sells something Especially selling a service something That feels as personal as coaching it Always feels like there's a bit of like A response to the selling of the thing Again I think when we have a bit of uh Tension inside when we're selling Something My experience tells me is that because You don't believe it in it enough you Don't believe in what you have to offer Enough I mean if you really believe that What you are offering whether it's a Product or whether it is a service has Values to The person's life yeah it is easy to Sell yeah it is easy to sell because You're coming from a place of I know This can have an impact on your life I Know that if we were to work together I Don't know what the outcomes would be But I know you will be in a very Different place 12 months from now Now if you truly believe that it comes Across the selling becomes easy now of Course it is challenging at the Beginning uh you know When I had the opportunity to meet my

First CEO client of a major business I had imposter syndrome I was like am I Ready to work with someone at that level And then I realized that in order to Show up and served them in a powerful Way I had to act in the present as the Person that I wanted to be tomorrow And that really helped to build that Belief to see that I was ready for what Was coming but also I was ready to have Those conversations Yeah it strikes me that this is this Thing of not believing in your own your Own product almost is a again just to Use the YouTube example is is an issue I See with a lot of YouTuber friends and I Have this a lot myself sometimes which Is where there's a bit of internal Tension around making a video because Like is this video actually good enough I'm not sure if this is if this is Actually going to be valuable Um but what I find you know as Austin Cleon writes about is that you know What's like usually we are our own worst Critics and The bar that we have for something that We put out is generally different to the Bar that the audience has and I could Put out something that I potentially Think is bad but could actually be Really helpful to 10 000 people yeah Possibly not 10 million people but hey Whatever but at least 10 000 people

Would find it useful and so in in that Sense what what do you think is this Balance between That internal feeling that I might have Of like my product isn't good enough I Feel a bit weird about it versus the Fact that even in its bad state it could Well be quite useful to someone and it Goes back to this idea of being attached To an outcome and open to everything is That when we're detached from the Outcome we're just focusing the process We get the first video out then we Simply step back and we ask ourselves One what went well and two what could be Better next time and then we do the next Video ask yourself the same question do The next video ask yourself the same Question so what we're focusing on is Less the outcome from each video but More the improvement from video to video And that's what's most important because As you said you can put out what you Think is a bit of bad content but Actually people lap it up you could put Out a bit of good content that you think Should do really well but just doesn't Do as great as you think and it's the Same thing with my book you know I wrote This book and there's Parts a book I Think are really good that people are Going to really enjoy and parts that I Think Are not as good as some other parts but

When the book is out in in the open I Suddenly get feedback and I'm seeing Some people highlighting pages that I Felt weren't as good as I thought it was And suddenly they found it really good And so I think it shows us that you Can't always predict people's feedback And opinion and Views before you put a Piece of content out and it is why again The process is so important focus on the Improvement rather than the quality of Every video because if you let quality Be your benchmark especially when you're Just starting you're going to give up You can say I don't have this camera I Don't have these resources I don't have This team well of course nobody had that When they first started but you've got To start somewhere I love that yeah yeah I had a I had a Moment in it was in one of our YouTuber Academy cohorts where someone said like You know they built the like the most Expensive package and they were like oh You know I just want to say you've Really changed my life that video that He put out on how to how to beat Imposter syndrome that that video really Resonated with me And I was so surprised because that was One of the worst performing videos on The channel I was like what and she was Like yeah you know it's because of that Video that I started my YouTube channel

And I you know got a promotion at work Because I realized that I could be Impostor Center in this way and that's Why I've signed up to your course and I Was just like completely flawed because In my mind that was a dud video it was Awful it was funny because you mentioned An awesome Cleon quote earlier and Another awesome clown quote just came up In my head which is we find our voice by Using our voice and that is the process Of iteration you know the more you use Your voice the more you can find what Your voice is You're not going to find it by Overthinking on the sidelines to the Point of it being too curated that You've kind of lost your voice in it You've just gotta as as Seth Godin says Ship it just keep shipping shipping Shipping eventually you find out what Your voice is I love it Simon thank you so much this has been Absolutely wonderful I feel like I came Into this thinking like okay right this This coaching thing is should have Surely surely like you and it's weird Because like I've had coaches basically Non-stop for the last like three years And it's been one of the most freaking Incredible Roi positive Investments of My life and actually like three days ago Started working with I mean the most

Expensive coach I've ever worked with is Like a CEO coach and immediately in like Session number one it just made so many Breakthroughs and he wasn't even telling Me much he was just asking the right Questions like somehow it's so Incredibly valuable and even though I Was trying to I was trying to give you a Hard time I just thought the way you Responded to everything which is so Great and you have this such this such Like warm and like Zen energy about you It's just like unflappable just chill And just like asking such good questions That really strike out oh my God yeah You're right that's so true um so thank You so much for being so gracious with Your time thank you so much for having Me ali um any final asks for the Audience anyone who might be watching or Listening to this A final forward and it's one that I Share in chapter two of my book which is In April 2020 my wife and I gave birth To our first child just a few days after The country went into his first lockdown And that process reminded me of Something that we so often forget which Is that we are all a miracle I mean the Fact that we were born is a miracle Event in itself We have won the greatest lottery ticket There is going I mean people dream about Winning the jackpot in the National

Regional Lottery we literally have won The greatest jackpot there is going the Lottery of life and the question I love To leave the audience with is this What are you going to do with that Winning ticket of yours I love it Clayman thank you so much Thank you all right so that's it for This week's episode of Deep dive thank You so much for watching or listening All the links and resources that we Mentioned in the podcast are going to be Linked down in the video description or In the show notes depending on where You're watching or listening to this if You're listening to this on a podcast Platform then do please leave us a Review on the iTunes Store it really Helps other people discover the podcast Or if you're watching this in full HD or 4k on YouTube then you can leave a Comment down below and ask any questions Or any insights or any thoughts about The episode that would be awesome and if You enjoyed this episode you might like To check out this episode here as well Which links in with some of the stuff That we talked about in the episode so Thanks for watching uh do hit the Subscribe button if you aren't already And I'll see you next time bye

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